Fishing The Coast, Oregon and Washington

August 2017


Happy August!
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What do you think about my pet bee colony? And I'm allergic! It looks a bit like a japanese lantern! My neighbor, Scott Nichols is going to help me extract it! Please, Scott! Hurry! LOL....
You can see more pics on my facebook, here.
By golly, I've done it again. I wrote something for here when I was in Oregon City, and I forgot to upload it! So, there is one more July entry that I'll add next time I'm there. As if "July" wasn't pitiful enough! Agh!
I just wanted to pop in to wish you a Happy August! But, while I'm here... There is something heavy on my mind.
It's no lie. You've noticed it and I certainly have, too. I don't know what it is. It's not really "writers block" because I'm not really a writer!
Words used to spill out of me. All of my life I have kept a journal! I had to release words onto paper. I have stacks of notebooks from when I was 13 and up, filled with words and thoughts.
I'm thinking my writing "hobby", (if that's what you can call it), would appear on a tombstone like this:

Jennie's Ramblings
1973-2013 (ish.)

I'd have to look to see when it began to happen. Was it during the sale of ifish? Is that what it is? No. It's not that, because I wrote long before I even had ifish.
That's the thing! I can't figure out what is going on that is causing me to abandon... wait. Is it when Andrew passed? Wow. Hit me with a hammer in the head. I wonder if that may be it.
Wow. That hit home. Maybe now that I know that's it, I can work on overcoming "it".
I'll never get over losing my son. How can I begin to open up, though?
I have never gone to counseling since I lost Andrew, and I do wonder if maybe I should. Or, at least join a grief group.
This rambling is kind of uninteresting for you guys, I'm sure. But, I'm leaving it here to mark the day that I discovered what's going on. I really do think this is the problem.
Not only do I not write much, but I haven't fished much, either. The two go hand in hand, I think!
This is kind of embarrassing and I promise not to mention it again!
Onward and upward! Let's try to make it through this heat, this week!

August 3rd

I promised myself that if I was still living 10 years from the date of my aortic dissection, I'd take a tropical vacation, like we did, right before Andrew passed. We went to Hawaii, and it was awesome! I also wanted to take some of Andrew's ashes there, because he loved it, so much! He spent the entire week in the water! Night and day! :)
It is going on 12 years, and it's still not in my budget (especially now!) So, I decided to take my vacation right here, right now! Nothing like a vacation at home!
I went out to buy a floatie for the river. Anything, just so that Willie and I could leisurely float around in the water in our own beautiful "lazy river"! Our very own "Typhoon Lagoon!". I couldn't wait! The canoe wouldn't do, because I wanted to be wet and cool during the heat wave.
I went to Tillamook Sporting goods and got just what I needed. A kind of inner tube thing that even had cup holders!! Yay! I thought I'd make some margaritas, and be on my way! :)
I had to laugh when Bill told me not to wear the inflatable PDF. Um. Really, Bill?! I still giggle!
Before we left, I thought we'd go down to the river to take Revvie out, because Bill had gone to town for a quick stock-up trip for dinner.
It was so strange, though. When I came back up from the river, Bill's truck was in the garage. His truck was in the garage-- but... my car was gone. What in the world had Bill needed my car for? I thought about it, as I leisurely hosed the sand off the dogs and my feet. I searched my brain for any reason and came up blank. All I knew, or thought... is that he MUST have taken it, because it was gone!
I walked into the house, and there was Bill, sitting in the chair. So... where was my car? Confusion overcame me!
I asked him. His mouth opened and said, "What? What do you mean, "Where is your car?" "
'BILL, WHERE IS MY CAR?" I asked again, as the fact that my car was probably stolen raced through my brain.
"Oh... my gosh, Bill! My car is gone! It's been stolen!"
"What?" Bill was befuddled and in as much in shock as I was.
He then recalled that he had seen it pass him about mp. 2, heading west on Kilchis River road, and thought I had a medical emergency or something.
The fact remained. My car had been stolen while I was 300 feet away, just across the lawn, and down the trail at the river!
This is just bizarre!
Where did these people come from, and how? Just why? Just???
I called the police. I have to say one thing for sure, before we even get started. We have an awesome police department! If you ever have an emergency in Tillamook County, it is the BEST place to have one. They are simply superb! They care. They are helpful, calm, and right on top of things.
Calling 911 when you are in stress is very difficult. It's hard to stay calm. You are in such a hurry that all the questions that they ask you seem trivial because you want action. But, I did OK.
A million things crossed my mind. What was in there? What did I lose? What do I do first?
I'm stressed even talking about this.
I'm still in shock, actually.
Long story short, the awesome Tillamook County Police helped me thru everything.
They found my car 2 hours or so after I reported it stolen. It was fine, although they had driven on the dusty Kilchis Forest Road (across the river from me) with my windows down, and it was an inch thick in dust!
What gets me, is that my keys were on the kitchen table, and my purse was in the car. They shuffled through my purse until they found the spare key!
This means that they still have a key to my car. I'm going to have to get my locks replaced, and get two new key fobs. They are so expensive, too! I had just replaced one and it was 300.00!!!
I had $700 in cash, as someone had just paid me for something and I hadn't been to the bank, yet. That wasn't all. I had all my credit cards, my license, of course, my medicare card, (which is your social security number- how dumb is that?) and gift cards.
There was so much more in my car. A leather lead for Kilchis that I loved, my mushroom cutting knife, my engraved Leatherman, oh my. I could go on, but I won't bore you. Just so much.
But those are all things. I'm just so glad I didn't walk in on this, alone. I very well could have and Bill wouldn't have been home.
The main thing I lost was part of my innocence and I feel violated. I loved this car SO much, and now I can't stand to get in it. It doesn't feel right, any more. That sounds strange, I know, but I have heard this from other people. They ruined my car. I feel, driving down the road that any car I may pass may have the criminals in it, and I don't know who to stick my tongue out at. But there is someone out there that I want to do that to! And I don't know who it is, so you are all guilty! LOL. Not really, but it kind of feels that way?
And when I think about it, I mutter the word "hate." I don't want to "hate" anything! That is such a strong word, and I've always been so against any of that word put on things or people!
I sometimes wish that God would take me before I lose all of "the joy, joy, joy, joy, down in my heart!"
If I had only known to do this, and here is a tip for you. I had my iphone in the car, and if ONLY I had first off, picked up my ipad and used the "find my iphone", I could have traced my iphone and the car! However, I hadn't even thought of that and they had. They turned my phone off. Smart robbers, they are.
So, yes. I lost my iphone, 700 in cash, and had to cancel all my cards.
I am no one, and let me tell you how darn hard it is to prove who you are, when you have no documents of proof. :(
Lucky, I had my birth certificate, and it was fairly easy to get my license.
I just have no money, and no way to get any, unless I go to the bank and withdraw... cash.
Here I go, using that word, but I HATE carrying cash, now, and I'm not doing it in the future.
After this week, I'm going to make it a point to not use the word "hate". But, for this week, I am giving myself permission to hate lots of things.
And I think next time I am going on vacation, I'm going to GO on vacation. Somewhere else. Like maybe, Disneyworld.... Yeah. At Typhoon Lagoon!
Because Disneyworld is the happiest place on earth!

August 5th

-First, I thought, "What a handsome man!"
-Then, he engaged me with his speaking about animals.
-Then, he kinda lost me about the PETA talk...
-but I kept listening, partially feeling guilty, and partially thinking to myself, "Here we go...." (With the guilt thing...)
I would so much like to know your feelings on this, the entire video, if you'd watch it, please. Watch it to the end.
I bashed (with total abandon) so many salmon, steelhead and sturgeon heads in with fancy "bonkers". I used to do it with glee, hungry for their flesh on the BBQ, but as I get older, I relish letting them free.
What the heck is wrong with me?
I have a dear friend that is a vegan, now. She adores animals and cares for them and supports these organizations financially. She sometimes guilts me, and I don't like that. I like her, however, more than I don't like the guilt. So, I keep on. She has been my friend through thick and thin for over 40 years, now. I've played concerts with her, and I've gone through the wild young adult years with her. I've flown to LA to see her and she's now home in Oregon, living on a small farm with adopted animals that need homes. I respect her so much! But, I also roll my eyes when the subject comes up, and I feel a bit guilty... like I said.
I eat meat. I love BBQ!
Can animals die without suffering, so that I may still eat meat and enjoy how I was raised, eating meat?
Or, in order to be the me that I want to be, do I have to stop?
I'm the type of person who always listens to both sides.
I once told an old boyfriend that I was sad because I don't think I'm opinionated enough. He told me that there are enough people that are opinionated and that my attitude is refreshing. I still don't know what I think of my un- opinionated self.
Am I not knowledgeable enough to stand for what I think, or do I not know what I think? You know what? I don't know. :)
But, I want your opinion. For, or against?
I laugh with others, saying that P.E.T.A. is "People enjoying tasty animals."
But... Is that funny? Or is my humor sad and ignorant?
Please help me land on an answer.

August 8th

One berry here, one there. There's enough for treats for the chickens, if I go around the entire perimeter of the field. They burst out at the end of the stem. It's always the middle berry in a clump that's ripest. I sneak one here, and one there for myself, but feel guilty when I do. They are so good, though!
There is nothing so "summer" as a warm, sweet blackberry, and Revvie thinks so, too!
Later in the summer, if we don't get a hard rain, the berries will be thick. I have my old "Grandma bucket" that my Grandma used for berries, way back when. Every time I take it out of the cupboard, they hear that familiar clatter of tin, and the dogs jump up and down.
"Let's pick berries!" They don't need the vocal command!
It's not only the fun of romping in the dry grasses, but sometimes when I get busy on a particularly heavy bush, I look down to throw a handful of berry bounty into the bucket and they land on Revvies head!
"Rev! Quit eating my berries!"
She looks up with a guilty grin.
She moves, and instead, proceeds to pick her own. They hang luscious and full on the unpicked lower branches.
Same as above me. They are so gorgeous! There is nothing like the beauty of blackish blue berries, tumbling out of the greenery of trees. What makes them even more attractive is that I can't reach them up there!
Willie doesn't care for berries as much as Rev. What don't labs eat with gusto? Springers are a bit more picky. They'd much rather run at full speed, barking gleefully at the top of their lungs, as they gallop around and around, and... around! Stop to eat? I don't think so.
"He flies 'round the field with the greatest of ease, that little brown springer with the white on his knees!
His name is Willie! Willie! Willie the Springer..." I sing to him as he runs.
Springers remind me of those lean, hard muscle athletes you see at the high school track. Mid day, in the height of a summer's day heat. It doesn't matter! They are running! Amazing! Stop to eat? Ha! They'll have a salad later, thanks, lounging at some cafe. (A salad with the dressing on the side, thanks.)
I've seen Willie ignore treats, even. If there is playing, running, activity to be done, they'd much rather. Willie would be so happy, if I were one of those athletes, like I spoke of.
Soon, there will be enough berries to make a pie. But, right now, there is just enough for one sweet berry per chicken. I make sure that no chicken gets two. There just aren't enough, right now.
My blueberries are a fail, this year. Out of 7 healthy bushes, filled with leaves, there is but one bush with berries. Only one or two of these are ripe, each day. They are mine, all mine. There will be no sharing! I think one day next week, I'll have enough for my cereal, but I'm not counting on it. I'm going to buy some at the store, darnit.
So, that's my story of berries, this year.
Do you have any, yet?

August 13th

It's raining. Finally! And the one day when it is cool, I have to keep both doors open, due to a chipmunk my cat brought in as a gift to Bill and I.
It wouldn't be that bad if she'd bring them in live so we could play with them, or see how cute they are, but she wants to kill them! And filet them!
So, I'm trying to let the little bugger escape. I think he's under the couch. He's not injured. Just scared to death, and I certainly don't blame him!
I really dislike the first two years of a cat's life, where they want to kill everything they can. I like my critters, thank you very much! Even the little ones, and especially the ones with feathers, darnit! Kitty, leave_ them_ alone!
I can certainly see why people have indoor cats. We've finally gotten so we keep her in at night. Next step, keep her in all the time? I just don't know how we could do that with dogs in and out all the time. I wish we could, though.
Maybe we shouldn't have cats. But... we do. We just DO.
Well, you have no idea (or unfortunately, perhaps you do) know how difficult it is to prove who you are, without anything to prove who you are.
Lucky that I have my birth certificate, or I'd never get anywhere. With everything stolen from my car, I have to replace... yes, everything!
They even tore my Orvis dog blanket in the back! And my leashes! Ugh.
Some things like my Freddies and Safeway card, I'm going to do without, and just use my phone number.
There has got to be some new technology, somewhere down the road that eliminates all the plastic we carry around with us. Why can't we use our fingerprints for everything? Or perhaps that retina tracking. Oh, my! Look at this!
I just did a google search and found a story about a "new Japanese phone with an iris scanner may mark a new era of password-free mobile payments" Read more!
Cool!
OK, you never know about new technology, but everything scares me about this bold new world.
And what about North Korea? Oh... my... word.
Talk about scary! I thought we were done with that fear.
Well, at least we have the eclipse to look forward to. LOL.


Joyce Sherman

I was reading the Northwest Steelheader magazine yesterday, and I just can't believe that Joyce Sherman will no longer be with the steelheaders. To me, she IS the steelheaders! Talk about a devoted volunteer and an awesome person! I will miss her so much, as the voice of the steelheaders. Well, she was the voice of the steelheaders for me, like I said...
I just don't understand why she is leaving. :( Just makes me so sad. I don't like change! It seemed like she took care of darn near everything at that office. Plus, it feels good to have a women fishermen in power.
Well, I have a real driver's license, now, and most of my other cards. Things are progressing, yes, but I still have that loss of innocence feeling and a feeling of invasion that won't leave me.
I drive down the roads in Tillamook and wonder if it was the guy in the car next to me that is smiling that broke into my car. I used to smile at everyone, but now... I wonder. Was it you? Or you? Or YOU???
At least my locks were changed. That key that they have is no good, anymore. Ha!
And I'm not going to keep the extra one in my purse!
And Mr. Robber? I hope when you use my Starbucks card, they spit in your drink! That's what I hope!

 

August 16th

As if I weren't wishy washy enough, before, now I read a moderator alert and I go read the "offending" problem and I see both sides. Shoot. I used to be able to pick out the problem, right away, and now I see "both sides, now!"
Agh. I had to have Bill read it. Then, a friend was over fly fishing, and I had him read it. "Who is in the wrong here? They are both just expressing their points of view!
A discussion ensued over the topic, and a good time was had by all!
I still haven't decided what to do on the mod board, though. I bet you anything, that the other moderators have it all handled, by this morning. I hope so! I'm interested to see what they say!
I have a darn pre op appointment at 8 this morning! I'm not used to getting up early, anymore! (If 6 is early!) I used to get up at 5, no problem! I am enjoying myself, at this hour. It's quiet and nice. It smells like Fall and feels like it, too. The world outside is chilly, crisp and fresh. I turned the heater up and pretty soon, I'll be too warm! For right now, it feels great, though!
I have a blepharoplasty scheduled for next week, and I cannot wait! I will be able to see better! I have had umpteen (and I kid you not!) eye surgeries. Each time they do it, they put a wire cage inside your eye and stretch your eyelids all out. With marfan, that connective tissue doesn't stretch back into shape!
I went into the preliminary appointment to see if insurance would pay for it. They do, if you can see better. I know I can see better, because get this! Before I drive to the coast, I use duct tape to tape my forehead up, so that my eyes are more open! Don't laugh! It helps me a bunch! I told the doctor that, and he nearly didn't put me thru the medical-legal paces!
He did put drops in my eyes that make it so that you had the surgery, and wow! My eyes were open like I haven't seen them since I was 6 years old! Yay! I cannot wait! Not only that, but you'll be able to see my eyes, too!
One bad thing, is that from all those surgeries, I have a keyhole iris. That, you'll be able to see better, too. They are a bit worried that now that the light will hit that more, I'll see more double vision. I sure hope not. I guess we'll see. There is a risk to everything. (Even leaving your car in your own garage, unlocked!)
Off I go to my pre op. After that, I'm going to go out and fling some flies. Ciao!

August 25th

Wow. I just listened to Taylor Swift's new song. I, as you probably know, have a user name of "swiftyoverfifty". Yes. I'm a swifty! The new song is depressing to me. It sounds like at 57, I am learning about life, what she is already learning at her young age! I guess you learn things faster in her line of fame. It's called "Look what you made me do" and I think it's about Kanye and all of that mess. I think it's about Taylor learning that life isn't always wonderful. At one sad point, she is picking up the phone and says, "No, the Taylor you know is not available. She died". Or, something like that.

Don't think I'm silly, but that crushed me. I think back to her innocent country days, when I actually adored her music and her innocence, and now, she claims that -that Taylor is "dead"?
Wow. I hope I never lose my innocence like that. I do feel like life is trying to make it so, but I flat out refuse.
The title of her album is "Reputation". I can see where that is going. If you want good tickets, by the way, sign up here.

Yes. My life used to be absolutely and perfectly enchanted. Everything was perfect. It was blueberry pancakes, and fishing trips. It was Diamond Lake in the crisp morning light, getting ready to fish with Grandpa. It was Disneyland and Mickey Mouse and summer mornings sleeping out under the wisteria.
I was raised thinking the world was wonderful, that it smelled wonderful, that everyone stayed with you, forever, and ever, amen.
They say you grow up, knowing for a fact that you die. It just never was considered in our family life! Isn't that odd? Or, maybe it just was that we learned we went to Heaven, so yeah. We never died. Just one awesome realm to another!
I loved life!
You can imagine how much it affected all of our family, when my Mom passed. And then , my Grandma. Then, my husband left our family. Then, I lost my Dad, and then reality continued crashing down with my aortic dissection, and then the unbelievable, my own son's death. Life showed challenges and hardships that I had never known.
It seemed like other things in life should go smoothly, but no! It just goes on! I went through breast cancer, and a collapsed lung. Then, other than health problems- Two weeks ago, someone came to my home and stole my car, all my money, all my credit cards, my iphone, everything! Right out of my garage!
Now, I have to laugh when things happen like when Willie came in the house, wildly rubbing against my carpet in Oregon City. My rugs, my bed, my blankets and what was that smell?!? SKUNK! OH MY!
I have to laugh, but I didn't at the time. I was so tired. It was 11 PM. I was ready for bed. My bones ached like they do at near 60. I was in no mood to bathe a dog. But, I stayed up, washed the linens, the rugs, and Willie... 5 times!
I can still smell it, today, 5 days, later!
It is like every day, I think will be better, but it has come to be an asked question of mine. "Jennie, what is your tragedy today?"
Well, I'll tell you!
Most people assume I still live on the Kilchis. But, I live half time in Oregon City. I tell you where I spend most of my time, though.
I live on the phone with AT&T!
They promised me that if I upgraded my phone, I'd get one free. Neato! I said, "However, I can pay no more than xxx a month. That is my budget. That's what I have. I can not go higher. Imagine my stress when I get the bill, and it is DOUBLE that! I told them my budget before my money was stolen! Now, I can barely afford what I told them!
I have a 20 year history with AT&T and I have never had problems until the last 2 months. Since then, I have spent probably 40 hours on the phone with them. I kid you not!
I didn't have the patience to argue it, yesterday, and now it's too late, as of today, to return my phones. I had surgery on my eyes, yesterday.
I'm in pain today, and have no patience for them, today, either.
Looks like God is just going to have to take care of me. Good thing that he does that. My sister told me that God challenges those he loves most.
Good thing I believe in God, because if I believed in Karma, I'd be in big trouble!
I'm hanging on to my innocence and like Willie and tug of war- I won't let go! Jennie has not died, Taylor! I'm hanging in there, and you should too!
This too will pass!
Maybe we should both go back to country! Me, to the Kilchis, FULL TIME and you.... to the country music stations! I firmly believe in both!
Anyone want to buy a lovely home in Oregon City?

August 26th
There are ifishers who can't login!
I'd be glad to help!

Two days and no tragedies! Just an update! LOL


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