Moron awards

fishisabonus · 01-22-2004, 10:43 PM

Okay ifish friends. I don't know if this has been posted yet, but this is the first time I have seen it. It is too funny to not share and with some of the things I have seen.. I believe it. Sorry if it is old news but this is from the recent MORON awards:

Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, Cal. some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 ft boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power was applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them what was wrong. A thorough top side check revealed everything in perfect working condition.

The engine ran fine, the out drive went up and down, and the propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.

NOW REMEMBER... THIS IS TRUE .

Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

After the last couple days I needed a good belly laugh and those must be shared! :grin:

Dinikin · 01-22-2004, 11:35 PM

You must be kidding, I always thought that it was supposed to stay there. To run straight on the beach and plunk. :smile:

GOT2FISH · 01-23-2004, 12:09 AM

NO!!

sparkleboy · 01-23-2004, 05:53 AM

I wish I had *** Clerk's icon to insert right here -->
That is just dumb. I mean, seriously, that's terrible.

Fshklr · 01-23-2004, 06:00 AM

finclipped · 01-23-2004, 06:02 AM

Just goes to show you, that anyone can buy a boat.

jokester · 01-23-2004, 06:34 AM

Quote:

Just goes to show you, that anyone can buy a boat.

<font size="2" face="verdana,arial,helvetica">My thoughts exactly. Think of that the next time you're on the water

-jokester

Luckybill · 01-23-2004, 08:28 AM

I think we need to get Myth Busters on this. I have heard this before, while very funny - I think this is a urban legend.

[ 01-23-2004, 09:28 AM: Message edited by: Luckybill ]

Fishin Magician · 01-23-2004, 08:55 AM

In astoria this summer.......we were getting ready to take out at free willies after a great day on the water. Well to make a long story short there was this dude in about a 25' brand new trophy that was taking up both lanes of the launch. He was spouting off about how much he spent on this boat , you know the type. Had no regard for anyone else and wouldnt accept help putting his boat on the trailer. 10 minutes later I see him take a swig off a 1/5 of jack. Well that tells the story. Upon pulling this high dollar beast out of the water, he neglected to trim up his outdrive. when the boat started down the hill it ground off the prop, then the whole outdrive snapped off, leaving it hanging by some cables. All the guy could do is yell @ what we assumed was his employee........what a dumb bell. At least that is the polite term.

Paddlefish · 01-23-2004, 09:27 AM

Yeah, I've heard that one before -- doesn't mean that it isn't true, though!

If I ever decide to do an "Outdoor Channel Reality TV show," all I'll need to do is hang around a popular launch (like Clackamette at the height of springer season) to get all the comedy footage I'll ever need.

Hawg Caller · 01-23-2004, 09:51 AM

Ive seen and heard alot of stuff at the boat ramps but that would take the cake!I would love to see a picture!

Buck50 · 01-23-2004, 09:58 AM

Want a laugh? Go hang out at the Hammond boat ramp at the height of bouy 10 season.
What a sight!

Grits · 01-23-2004, 10:27 AM

You guys are giving the water skiiers to much credit. The best comedy routines at the boat ramps are at lakes on the first warm weekend. Nothing like a bunch of people who had their boats sitting for six months trying to launch.

The best I saw personally was a guy joking me about my "tub" pull out with the motor down. He was at least smart enough to stop before totally ripping of the outdrive but held the launch for a few hours waiting for a mechanic to come up and tell him the best strategy for moving his boat any further.

I'm with Luckybill we need to send this one to myth busters.

Spoiled Daddy · 01-23-2004, 10:48 AM

Two summers ago at Devils Lake in Lincoln City we watched as a drunk tried to run his ski boat up on the beach near the boat ramp on the east side of the lake. It wouldn't stick in the mud and stay put, so after two more tries, he backed off and gave it the gas. It ran up the mud, onto the grass and stopped just short of where his buddy was standing with another cooler full of beer in his hands. The drunk staggered out of the boat and they stood around a drank a couple of more beers while pondering how to get the boat off of the grass. They pushed and pushed, [img]graemlins/icon_argue.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/1zhelp.gif[/img] but both forgot the outdrive was down and crammed into the grass. [img]graemlins/dork.gif[/img] They finally figured it out, but by that time OSP showed up and bagged the driver of the boat for BUII. [img]graemlins/applause.gif[/img] Just a little justice on the water... or grass.

SD

fishbait · 01-23-2004, 10:50 AM

So I was in line at the 5th street ramp about 12 -14 years ago and about 10 boats infront of me is about a 19ft bayliner type boat, cabin, I/O real pretty. Well we were about 2 hours from low water and running good, about an hour till light. So I went up to talk to the skipper. I politely asked if he had ever launched here before and he said no, he was avoiding the line at Memaloose. I suggested that he talk to some other people about the river before he launch as I thought he would have problems. Well he instantly informed me that he had been fishing down here for many years, was an expert boat handler and I could just keep my opinions to myself, which I promptly did. He then acccused me of just trying to talk him out of launching to get him out of the line. Oh well I tried. On my way down the river as it started to just barely get light , well here was this real pretty boat, sitting kinda sideways almost high and dry in about a foot or two of water. I barely made it around him, had to raise the kicker on my DB and use the oars as push poles. A few boats were unable to get around him and were kinda ****sed. He was gone when I came back up on the flood and never say him again in the river or the bay.

fishisabonus · 01-23-2004, 02:31 PM

About three years ago showed up at the ramp in Milwaukee and there was cops blocking off the ramp and a tow truck there... then a diver comes out of the water. Okay... we are curious now... and decided to sit back and watched the show.

It took some doing, cause of the way it drops off there.. but eventually they pulled out a brand new full size 4x4 with a very nice trailer behind it with the equally beautiful boat securly attached to it. [img]graemlins/dork.gif[/img]

Paddlefish · 01-23-2004, 02:38 PM

I arrived at the San Salvador launch near St. Paul on the Willamette one afternoon to find a fancy van and boat trailer whose driver must have figured that launching off the gravel bar was somehow preferable to using the paved ramp.

They must have been successful in launching the boat, as there wasn't one in sight, but their problems arose when trying to climb up the steep, loose gravel bank.

He must have done some fancy tire spinning as his wheels had dug themselves some pretty impressive holes in the river bank. His trailer was totally submerged, his rear bumper was under water, and the Willamette was lapping against the lower couple inches of his rear doors.

However, there was nobody in sight. They just left it. Must have figured that a few hours water skiing on the river in the hot sun with a couple of cases of beer would make the extraction process easier. [img]graemlins/dork.gif[/img]

James in Idaho · 01-23-2004, 02:45 PM

Hey, my dad launched his trailer a couple of years ago. Big sailboat, so you back the trailer down on a cable. Got the boat launched, the guy driving the truck managed to get a little slack in the cable and when it popped up tight, it opened up the eye that it was hooked to. This ramp is really long, and it was bye-bye trailer. Took a couple of days, but after the weekend crowd was gone the "old fart brigade" started looking (I live too far so I didn't get to dive on it) found it with a fishing sonar, managed to hook it with an anchor, and up it came. Mom said they should loose a trailer every year, gives the old farts something to do!!!!!! Another (much younger) guy did the same thing about three weeks later, and refused to let the old farts help. He ended up hiring divers out of Albuquerque to come up and find it, and that was not cheap. Sometimes those old bulls know what they are talking about!

gthfish · 01-23-2004, 03:19 PM

20 plus years ago, before the new American Falls Dam was built, there was a large forebay to deepen the water going into the power penstocks. Very wild powerful water between the dam and the power plant. A guy parked his brand new truck , trailer and boat on the cliff above the forebay, and left. The outfit rolled off the cliffand into the forebay. They had to shut off the dam flow and drain the forebay to retrieve the rig.

Pickles · 01-23-2004, 03:44 PM

About 15 years ago, I witnessed an event at the boat ramp. I was about eighteen at the time. After a day of being out on the river with friends we headed back to the boat ramp. Upon getting to the boat ramp, I went to retrieve the truck and trailer. After bringing the truck around to the ramp, I noticed a van backing down the boat ramp with a big (24-26ft) fiberglass cuddy. Well it was the middle of the summer and the water was pretty low. As the van backed down, his winch rope snapped and off rolled his beautiful boat right onto the concrete. Once all the commotion was over, I noticed that all this guy had for winch rope was some cheap yellow nylon/poly rope that was about the same diameter as ski rope. You would think that someone who had that kind of money to purchase a boat like that, would at least invest in a decent winch strap!

Akuracy503 · 01-23-2004, 03:53 PM

The first story wins! haha thats amazing

Silver Hilton · 01-23-2004, 03:57 PM

Two years ago I was fishing silvers on the Snohomish. I had put in and was idling out in the river, waiting for my friend to come back from parking the trailer. It's the peak of silver season, in a peak year, at 7:00am on a saturday morning. It's a zoo. One of those days when anything that floats, and some things that don't are pulled out and dumped into the water. A study in humanity, as it were.

Some of these boats have seen hard living. You always wonder, as you drive by these boats on the hiway, how they came to look that way. Well, we got a demonstration.

A guy pulls up at the top of the ramp in one of this more questioable craft. At the beginning it was just another 18 foot trihull with a beat to crap merc on it. Boat and motor were pushing 30 years old.

The guy pulls up at the top of the ramp and proceeds to through his kids, dog, lunch, beer, grandma, toolkit, sears catalog, etc into the boat. Mercifully he was fairly quick about this, which was good, or the crowd might have gotten ugly.

He had his buddy get into the truck to back the boat down the ramp. As the ramp was crowded, Einstein decided to undo the trailer rope at the top of the ramp. He then fired up the motor, at the top of the ramp. The loud stacatto of the two stroke beating itself to death was a good thing, as it scattered the onlookers who were circling like vultures. He waved at his buddy to start backing down the ramp.

Over the Bracketa-bracketa-bracketa of the aching merc, we heard a sudden screeching, as the rust started flaking off the rollers, allowing the boat to slide. The slide accelerated, and was terminated by the crunch of the skeg breaking, followed by the crushing of fiberglass.

The boat had enough momentum that it slid completely off the trailer, and down the ramp, twisting sideways as the remnants of the skeg slowed the speed of the rear of the boat, while the front wanted to keep traveling.

The Merc stopped, and it's noise was replaced by the crying of the kids, the barking of the dog, and the profanity of the boat driver. The rest of us all stood transfixed, except for the few who were taking notes. "unhook the boat after the stern is in the water..."

Boedy · 01-23-2004, 08:16 PM

SHLEPROCK · 01-23-2004, 08:49 PM

pour more on

lilnorthfork · 01-23-2004, 09:22 PM

As my friend's great-aunt always said, "if you can't laugh at yourself, pick somebody else and laugh at them." Great stuff, keep em rolling.

mophile · 01-23-2004, 10:12 PM

[img]graemlins/applause.gif[/img] more!! more!!!

lester · 01-23-2004, 11:04 PM

Must have wondered why it rode so low in the water too.

SPAZZ · 01-24-2004, 09:14 AM

KingCap · 01-24-2004, 12:04 PM

Years ago We were at a local ramp for a kids derby . A father with a 14` aluminum boat backed down and slid the boat off the trailer onto the ramp and handed his son the rope to hang onto . As the father got back into his truck to go park somehow the rope got tangled up into the trailer and as he drove off the rope pulled away from his sons hand and pulled the boat all the way to where he parked . The boy was in tears as he thought he had done something wrong but when the Dad got out and saw what had happened he just asked his boy if he was OK and dragged the boat back down to the water and went fishing

Herring Impaired · 01-24-2004, 12:48 PM

Once at the Weyerhauser Ramp in Longview, several years ago, there was a fellow that drove his boat onto the trailer, hopped in the truck and pulled up the ramp. The boat promptly parted ways with the trailer and was left on the ramp. Got out, pushed the boat back into the water, backed the trailer down, drove the boat back on to the trailer, pulled up the ramp, and again, the boat slid off of the trailer.

Everyone makes mistakes, but the smart ones learn from them and try not to repeat them. To slide the boat off the trailer twice in a row ???

Funnier now than it was then, I was waiting to get my own boat out of the water!

fishisabonus · 01-24-2004, 02:04 PM

fishnagain · 01-24-2004, 03:02 PM

Last year at the mouth of the lewis I beleive it's called Dotty's there was a guy standing on something about in the middle of the river up to his waist in about 45 degree water with no shirt on, after watching this guy freeze for a few minutes and seeing the tow truck on the ramp we parked the boat to get the story and it turns out the guy who looked like he was waiting to load up his boat was waiting for the tow truck to hook up to his boat trailer and dodge truck that were 2 feet under water.Apparently the mans wife who was helping him launch backed him down the ramp and then took her foot off of the brake to place a block of wood under the tire so as it wouldn't roll

the funny thing is This rig was under water for over 30 min and when they pulled the rig up,the cab was completely filled with water and the turn signal and wipers were still working.

[ 01-24-2004, 04:06 PM: Message edited by: fishnagain ]

Away2Long · 01-24-2004, 07:40 PM

Try http://www.snopes.com
to check those urban legends.

Searched for Lake Isabella on that site and came up with the same story - they think it is a true one.

will_e_fish · 01-24-2004, 08:30 PM

I have seen tw boats dumped on the concrete ramp up at Beaver Bay a couple of times usually the driver and copilot are under the influence of Jack Daniels. I talked to the camp host about a sign he said it happens more than people think it would and a sign might save a few boat bottoms.