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Old 08-25-2010, 09:28 AM   #1
MadMerganser
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Default Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Should have been here yesterday.

What plug?


Post em up!

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Old 08-25-2010, 10:10 AM   #2
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Wasn't your rod in the rod holder just now?

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Old 08-25-2010, 10:20 AM   #3
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I thought you were going to bring the bait?
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Old 08-25-2010, 10:36 AM   #4
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Thumbs down Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

You only brought 4 bullets?
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Old 08-25-2010, 10:38 AM   #5
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Fisherman don't die they just smell like it

Hunters don't die they just reload

Did you put the plug in?
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:02 AM   #6
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

you got the keys right?
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:11 AM   #7
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Wasn't your wife in the boat when we left the dock? (No, I've never heard that one for real....just buddies joking about it!)
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:24 AM   #8
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

The boat runs on $, not thanks.

I thought you said you knew how to net?

If your cell phone rings one more time, it's going in the ocean!
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:40 AM   #9
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

you know how to fillet right?

you said you been in the ocean before!

are we lost?

were's the net?

who gets to fight the fish?

is it my turn?

can i drive?

the list can go on and on
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:56 AM   #10
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Is this fuel gauge working?

Has anyone seen my boots?




I personally own 4 nets to many.

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Old 08-25-2010, 12:08 PM   #11
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Worst day fishing beats the best day working....

an oldie but goodie

or

Q. What are ya fishing for?
A. Cause I didn't want to sit at home!
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:09 PM   #12
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Fish On!
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:37 PM   #13
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

HIT IT! HIT IT!! HIT IT!!!.....nevermind.
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:46 PM   #14
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How'd you get that blister on your thumb?
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:51 PM   #15
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Those weren't maple leaves....
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:52 PM   #16
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

you forgot your license?!?!?!?!
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Old 08-25-2010, 12:52 PM   #17
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Back in my early 20's, my buddy and I would stay up late a lot in the camper a drinkin' hard and playing cribbage. Young and dumb hunting.

One morning, I said "Get up Eric!"

He said without hesitation, "I'm waiting for the thermals to rise." zzzzzzz


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Old 08-25-2010, 01:52 PM   #18
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We say this when we are not sure if your buddy has a fish on.

"Are you in"!
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Old 08-25-2010, 01:54 PM   #19
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Did you put the plug in?
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Old 08-25-2010, 02:11 PM   #20
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Is that a baby ruth bar?
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Old 08-25-2010, 02:24 PM   #21
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

I heard this one today.... only one fish caught in the hogline, about a 28 lb. chrome bright chinook, outside line....

I asked "Why did you release that fish?"

He answered "It was a native. You have to release them. It's new this year."


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Old 08-25-2010, 02:38 PM   #22
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

You pull into gas station at 4:00a.m with the boat hooked up and the gas pump guy ask..." YOU GOIN FISHIN ".
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Old 08-25-2010, 02:46 PM   #23
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

I still love my Buddy's line, as I questioned a new and strange looking lure he was putting out:

"If it works it will be really effective!"

Yeah right

"Don't set the hook! Set the hook!"

(while err... compromised) "Get it for me! Get it for me!"

(While having a good day) "Who wants this one?"

A new one - when losing a fish at the boat; "There's still some chicken left on that bone"

"You're keeping that!?"
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Old 08-25-2010, 03:14 PM   #24
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Can I have it?

I'll net it, I've done it once before.

Are you going to eat it?
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Old 08-25-2010, 03:17 PM   #25
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

"All fishermen are liars, except you and I. And I don't believe a word you say!"
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Old 08-25-2010, 03:23 PM   #26
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

wait....Wait.....WAIT
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Old 08-25-2010, 03:33 PM   #27
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

"Hey where is my bobber"
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Old 08-25-2010, 03:46 PM   #28
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

I found it the last place I looked.
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Old 08-25-2010, 04:03 PM   #29
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Hey put on that tinfoil hat, I need you to help me tune my GPS.

Early to bed, early to rise, fish all day, Tell big lies.

Good things come to those that bait.

Life's too short to fish without beer.

Are you "Sport-fishing" or did you catch something?
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Old 08-25-2010, 04:08 PM   #30
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FREE BEER......
Tomorrow
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Old 08-25-2010, 04:11 PM   #31
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

yes i have a license, i bought a 2 day when we went out last month and only used it one day. Why?
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Old 08-25-2010, 05:00 PM   #32
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

It's in the mouth! (really?)
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Old 08-25-2010, 05:05 PM   #33
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

I thought you trailered the out drive.
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Old 08-25-2010, 05:11 PM   #34
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

He was this big!
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Old 08-25-2010, 05:11 PM   #35
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Where's all the elk?
or
Seein' any?
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Old 08-25-2010, 05:20 PM   #36
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

A guide said to me as we stepped into his boat, "It's a good day for a boat ride boys!".
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Old 08-25-2010, 05:55 PM   #37
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Thats why they call it fishing and not catching...

and I was a guide... and not a GOD...
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Old 08-25-2010, 05:59 PM   #38
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

"I used to do that when I first started!"
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Old 08-25-2010, 06:51 PM   #39
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:d"thats what she said!"
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Old 08-25-2010, 07:10 PM   #40
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I've had this one around for years.

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Old 08-25-2010, 07:26 PM   #41
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Quick hold my beer
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Old 08-25-2010, 08:12 PM   #42
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It was really good yesterday and will be twice that good tomorrow..........Just not so good today!!
Where did you hook that fish? In the mouth.
You catch that one in the river?
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Old 08-25-2010, 08:14 PM   #43
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When fall chinook fishing with newbies...
Q. How will we know when we have a fish on?
A. You'll know

and

Hike up your dress and reel that fish in...
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Old 08-25-2010, 08:37 PM   #44
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When asked why they were not catching fish. "Well, all the good fishermen are catching them"



It is not the rod in the hand, but the hand on the rod.
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Old 08-25-2010, 08:44 PM   #45
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Where is the TP?

Wait, let them circle again.

Take-em.
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Old 08-25-2010, 08:52 PM   #46
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

I thought you put the plug in?
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Old 08-25-2010, 08:56 PM   #47
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Yeah, I brought enough toilet paper - for me

Who's cookin'?

There's lot's of room around them

Shoot straight

Where?? Where??

Aw man, who farted?

Whatcha catchum on?
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Old 08-25-2010, 08:59 PM   #48
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One more and we'll have one.

If you're hungry I brought some bananas, there in the cooler next to the bait.
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Old 08-25-2010, 09:31 PM   #49
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As a wise old slow poke often says..................
"You can't make soup out of tracks!!"
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Old 08-25-2010, 09:37 PM   #50
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Quote:
Originally Posted by guido1161 View Post
One more and we'll have one.

If you're hungry I brought some bananas, there in the cooler next to the bait.
I like that one, Welcome to ifish!
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Old 08-25-2010, 10:12 PM   #51
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when you comeback from deer or elk hunting and somebody asks you "Did you catch one?"

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Old 08-25-2010, 10:13 PM   #52
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"I think I got a snag" - It's what I said before I realized I had this chinook on the hook.


Last edited by NWDomer; 10-08-2010 at 08:20 AM.
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Old 08-25-2010, 10:47 PM   #53
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NWDomer View Post
"I think I got a snag" - It's what I said before I realized I had this chinook on the hook.

That's the same thing my buddy said when he got his first Willy springer this year! lol
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Old 08-26-2010, 04:34 AM   #54
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Do we have enough gas?

I think so.


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Old 08-26-2010, 06:15 AM   #55
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4:30 am! I"ll be there...
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Old 08-26-2010, 06:38 AM   #56
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you know what I always say
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Old 08-26-2010, 06:43 AM   #57
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

Quote:
Originally Posted by TyeeTom View Post
Hike up your dress and reel that fish in...
May I take this one for my arsenal please?



Quote:
Originally Posted by BrushApe View Post
"You can't make soup out of tracks!!"

Also have heard, "Yeah, well those tracks are gonna make mighty thin soup"
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Old 08-26-2010, 08:22 AM   #58
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

As I was rolling a cart full of albacore tuna to the Newport cleaning station a man with a small coho asked, "Where did you get those???"

"West of here..."
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Old 08-26-2010, 08:24 AM   #59
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

When a pleasure boat comes by and asks what we are fishing for:

"Ah we aren't fishing, we are just watching the submarine races"
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Old 08-26-2010, 08:55 AM   #60
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Default Re: Best Fishing/ hunting/ outdoor One liners

People, if your comment is no longer on the thread it is because it was inappropriate or contained a salty double meaning.

Let's keep it clean. Thanks.
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