My friend Bait-O-Eggs

fishbait · 01-26-2002, 09:25 AM

With the rivers blown, and the wall beginning to close in, I would like to take this opportunity to take exception with those of you that are picking on my friend Roy, he is not a cracker. Shame on you, didn't your mother teach you not to pick on the less fortunate. Just imagine if you were the one that had to ride the short bus to school for all those years. :depressed: Now that he has his medication properly adjusted his fascination with flame chared smoked salmon has almost disappeared. Furthermore, I happen to know for a fact that he is once again allowed to write with sharp objects, so Gizz, your comments are a little out of date. And stop teasing him about his gear, Zebco is a very respected brand name and K-mart. :tongue: :tongue: He is my friend and I will stand by him (except for those times when he has an accident) :whazzup: and defend him. After all, with friends like me he doesn't need any enemies. :grin:

Hookset · 01-26-2002, 12:01 PM

WTG Fishbait, nice to see a true friend stick up for a fallen comrade. If BOE had a few more freinds like you, he wouldn't have to worry anymore about all those skeleton's he's been caring around.......

:tongue:

Gizmo Man · 01-26-2002, 04:33 PM

fishbait...why bring me into this...I too am one of the only two people that will admit in public that we are friends.

And to those who think Roy suffers from SMS (short man syndrome)...I can tell you unequivocally, he does not. We have discussed this at great lengths. He does have something called TME, however. The doctors have assured him that it is not contageous and that if he tries he can overcome this. I understand that the therapy prescribed for this is spending time with his son Jack, at Jack's preschool. In just a few short weeks, since starting this therapy, his wife tells me he has burned his stilts and have raised the cabinets back to their original height. Yes Roy has finally found a place where he can be the tallest man around. :smile:

By now you are probably wondering what this TME syndrome is...It is TALL MAN ENVOY! :grin: :grin:

Loved you in your tutu friend...and yes, I went by your KMART and they still have your special cart so you can reach the shelf.

Geezer...

Bait O' Eggs · 01-27-2002, 09:55 AM

I have recectly erased all names out of my phone directory and have no friends. :depressed: From what I read here I doubt I had any friends to start with. :shocked:

Wanted: Fishing Partner(s)
Requirements as follows:
1. Somebody who does not have a smart *** attitude

(see eraser marks under G and F in my directory, you are not elibable)
2. Willing to fish every day of the year.
3. Doesnt mind when I bring the boat and bait.
4. You have to be on time, I dont wait at the dock for anybody.
5. You need your own tackle box. And only 1 tackle box per trip. I dont care how big it is as long as you can pick it up with one hand. Geezer has this thing about trying to hitch his garage up to the boat.
6. Nothing in the pink family is allowed as outer garments, if you want to wear something soft and frilly underneath, what I dont know about I dont care about.

Geezer and Fishbait had this fettish with telling me about their lacey womens panties. I dont care how soft and supple they are, I aint wearing them.

By the way, what is it with these old fisherman we have on ifish. Ever notice how they are all crippled up. They are like a bunch of old ladies sitting around the hen house complaining about their back or their shoulder, or what ever ails them.

Maybe we need to get a sponsor at ifish that has coupons for hip replacements and such so these old timers can get out to the water once in a while. :tongue:

CAGEY · 01-27-2002, 01:41 PM

Dear Mr. Bait o Eggs.

Your remarks regarding the older fishermen/ladies complaining about their shoulders, backs, necks, whatever can be easily explained.
1. We have lived longer than you and are much wiser.
2. We know far more than you know about catching fish.
3. We dont just set around the hen house. We have Dr. appointments, shopping. boat buying, and all kinds of things that we do everyday while you little whippersnappers are working to support us.
I personally have to go to the donut shop up to three and sometimes four times a week, do you call that just setting around.
Maybe we should have a contest between you kids and the over the hill gang to see who can catch the most fish, drink the most whisky, and not get kicked out of the house when we get home.
Personnaly i think you would look good in a frilly outfit :tongue: :tongue: :grin:

Just remember this," Old Age and Treachery Will Overcome Youth And Skill."

There, now i have defended the old goats on ifish.

Cagey :tongue: :grin:

Gizmo Man · 01-27-2002, 02:56 PM

Cagey: These young snotnosed kids should listen to your words of wisdom :grin: :tongue: especially, that Roy fella...

I think we might take your advise and have a contest that puts the geezers catch against the snot noses... what do you think...

Geezer...

01-27-2002, 04:06 PM

In for that one on the geezer team! :grin:

Stz ll · 01-27-2002, 04:19 PM

I need to know what is the definition of an old geezer vs. a young punk? If there is going to be a fish off the date of it could make a difference!! :shocked:

Until I get this resolved I better stay out of this one I could be ruffling the wrong feathers.

:shocked: :depressed: :grin:

Gizmo Man · 01-27-2002, 05:38 PM

Pete: regardless of your age, you are in class by your self...an old far_t .. :smile: :smile: As ugly and old looking as you are, you cannot pass yourself off as anything but an old far_t ...

This contest will be tied into the f4. We will weigh fish in 3 categories 1: real snotnoes-under 25... 2:snotnoses-25 to 49...and 3: the geezers 50+

Any takers...

geezer... :smile:

]

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CAGEY · 01-27-2002, 05:55 PM

Gizmo
Man Yeah maybe a little contest would not be a bad idea. We would have to be the ones to set the ground rules as you cant trust them young bucks. :tongue:

******, you are signed up.

Stz11 Iam not sure how to class and old geezer. :depressed: I think if a person is 70 or older they are considered geezers.

40 to 50 are over the hill.

Between 50 and 70 are just very experienced guys and gals who have got it all together, :grin: :grin:
So looking at from a them against us i would say if you are 50 or older we are on one side and they are on the other. :tongue:

The Honorable Cagey,

fishbait · 01-27-2002, 06:15 PM

Bait-O-Eggs

You should be ashamed of yourself...........

See what you started...........

And Giz and I actually tried to stand up for you..

Shame, Shame, Shame

Stz ll · 01-27-2002, 06:21 PM

Well I guess that does it. I will have my 50th birthday before flotilla 4. :shocked: :shocked:

Watch out you young punks. Us old folks are serve you young punks a can of WOOP *SS.

:grin:

FM2 · 01-27-2002, 06:47 PM

Is competition good or what!! Old vs Young, Catching vs Fishing, Smack vs Facts, Friends vs Friends, Boat vs Boat(and who's in it :grin: ) Smoking w/electric vs propane :smile: ....let's see, what did I leave out, oh yeah F4 will clear it all up!! :grin: :grin:

Bait O' Eggs · 01-27-2002, 07:02 PM

The down fall at F4 of you old timers is you dont realize that fixodent, polident and stool softeners are actually fish repellants. :shocked: :shocked:

Cagey - Does the health insurance cops get from the state have a special clause for the health risk associated with hanging out at the donut shop 40 hours a week for 30 years.

the powdered sugar on all them donuts you have eaten would rot out even nanooks wooden teeth.

And the special category of "extra extra geezer" will be made up for ****** alone. ****** will be the winner in this category no matter what, since nobody else is old enough to qualify, the only thing older than ****** is dirt. :shocked: Of course the only way ****** will show up at the weigh ins is if he finds a retarted fish that swam into one of them spinners when it wasnt looking. He hasnt been able to make a single ifish event in a couple years. I guess he doesnt want to come see everybody elses fish, and show that shiny clean fish box of his.

If Giz is still with us come April, he will look like one of them old timers you see at Walmart that jumps out of his 40 foot motor home in a one piece powder blue jump suit and white plastic shoes.

How I am gonna get him in and out of the boat is beyond me. But dont you worry I will be at Sunset Retirement home to pick you up April 13th, right after they serve up your favorite bowl of mush. And if Giz isnt with us, I will bring a picture of his tombstone, rumor is his wife was gonna get his headstone enscribed kind of like the F4 motto with a small modification. "The really little one", I am not sure what she means but I have an idea.

Why STZ would rush into a team of geezers is beyond me. :whazzup:

I can talk all the smack I want about you geezer before F4, because 1/2 of you will forget the contest by April and the other half of you will be pushing up spring daisies. :depressed:

Sincerely

Snot nosed spring chicken

PS Fishbait you stared this mess, for that no checkers tonight after the nurses finish your bath. And dont get cute, or you will only get ball bearing nurses to give you your bath.

fishchaser · 01-27-2002, 07:13 PM

Hey STZ II. "YOU'LL BE AN OLD GEEZER! YOU'LL BE AN OLD GEEZER!" :grin: :grin: I'm still an snotnose punk. :tongue: This ought to be intresting at the F4. We usually are on the same team. Your Boat. Now I'll be with the younger generation. I know mamma's no young chicken. And Pappa is on his last artery, Hey I got to take care of them. They still fall in the young category. Bye OLD FA*T, Gramps,

bigshark · 01-27-2002, 07:24 PM

Hey BOE, these guys sure are some-kinda-buddys. Oh yes, I was wondering if true friends have any particular color in their mouths? :grin: :grin:

Stz ll · 01-27-2002, 11:10 PM

Give them *ell BOE. :grin:

I did really like the pink tutu though. I think Gizmo would look good in also. :tongue:

fishbait · 01-27-2002, 11:13 PM

BOE 9
FB 8

Nice rebuttal. Roy, you said that if we quit showing you you would not say a word..........

WaterDog · 01-27-2002, 11:35 PM

Roy,

You forgot to add:

7. Must be able to stand (straight up) under new boat top.

8. Fishing buddy must have own boat for O'Dark thirty bar crossings. (Purdy flashing lights are irrelevant.)

:smile:

Ramstrong · 01-28-2002, 09:21 AM

OK guy's this has gone on long enough. I'm surprised that Roy has taken this for so long. I fished with Roy a lot last year in the willamette before work. Roy knows a slot next to one of the bridges in downtown portland that kicked out a few fish for us last year. Roy made me swear to secrecy as no one fishes this spot. However I feel it is my duty to defend the little guy's honor now. Besides, I don't think anyone will find the spot out anyway. Here's a picture of one of the fish Roy popped last year in March this was taken in the parking lot of roy's company thus not giving the spot away. All naysayers shall now be silenced.

CAGEY · 01-28-2002, 09:42 AM

Ramstrong, thanks for the picture of that eggs guy. He really is short. Does he carry a ladder to get in and out of his boat?

Eggs, no we did not need that kind of insurance as unlike your profession we were not allowed to screw off all day long. :tongue:

Let me add that these posts have been fun and no one has stepped on any toe's. Just goes to show you that we can have fun on this board and we do not need to be nasty to do it.
All you old geezers have a nice day. :grin:

:smile:

Yeah and you kids have a good one to.

Cagey

01-28-2002, 09:47 AM

Gee Roy and I was just getting ready to write a defend you post too, Steeplander and all. WAS being the key word. :grin: :grin: :grin:

WaterDog · 01-28-2002, 09:55 AM

I don’t want to belittle

Eggs, but that boat top looks to nice to be last year. The last I saw that top it was in heap and now parts of it have been resurrected on that sporty new top he’s got.

Ryan, nice try to redeem him but it’s just too daunting of a task.

Bait O' Eggs · 01-28-2002, 10:07 AM

Ryan, you just crossed the line

You put 3 springers in 5 mornings in my boat last year in "the slot". Now you go blab

Consider yourself permanently exiled from my boat.

I dont expect to see your buddy Rippenlips and you fishing the slot before work this year. You promised to keep quite about the spot and the fish we were catching. :depressed:

Some things dont need said on the board. Our success last year was one of them. I am surprised you didnt post what bridge we were fishing under, and which piling.

I am dissapointed :depressed:

fishchaser · 01-28-2002, 10:13 AM

Ddon't worry BOE. Most of us know the spot anyway. We just don't fish in downtown. We have a better sight. The Salmon just sit around and wait for us to come to them. :shocked:

Gizmo Man · 01-28-2002, 10:19 AM

Ryan: that pic. doesn't prove anything other that Roy can hold up a trout and pose. Due to his size, he really makes that 16" trout look big. :smile:

Show us one where he is with rod in hand,and landing a fish.

As waterdog points out, that top is too new looking so that picture can be up to 12 years old... :shocked: and with todays scanners you bring no proof... :tongue: other than you know how to post a pic on the board.

How much did you pay him Roy! :tongue:

Giz... :grin:

Ramstrong · 01-28-2002, 10:42 AM

Damn Roy, I stick up for you and you get ******. Don't worry, you won't see Jon and I in your precious little spot, I actually have to work now. I figured coming to bat for you for all of the **** you've been pitched lately you wouldn't mind. It's not like I gave anything away. How many bridges are there in portland? You deserve what you get man. Short man's syndrome at it's finest.

Bait O' Eggs · 01-28-2002, 10:55 AM

What ever

Tanner · 01-28-2002, 12:13 PM

Ooops.

Pilar · 01-28-2002, 12:43 PM

:grin: :tongue: :grin:

Seefood Man · 01-29-2002, 05:29 AM

I'm at the age now that I can still remember the past and able to apply it to the future

For the young spuds out there remember this:

Older the bull....The stiffer the horn

Bait O' Eggs · 01-29-2002, 06:21 AM

Ryan
You were right from the beginning, forgive me for ever doubting you. :grin: Catching Carp on ifish is just a piece of cake.

Though there is no limit on Carp in the state of Oregon, I didnt plan on taking all of them home on this trip to the river. Well Geezer and Waterdog wouldnt bite, I guess they know me to well.

Thanks for the bait, one of these days you need to show me how do that photo "bait and switch".

I got an entire photo album that could be enhanced with a salmon here and salmon there

We wont use any boots like ****** has in his photos though.

Gotcha! and that goes to more of ya than willing to admit to it. :tongue:

Now if we only had a slot to fish

[ 01-29-2002: Message edited by: Bait O' Eggs ]</p>

Ramstrong · 01-29-2002, 07:15 AM

Ahhhh the power of paint shop pro.

You start with this.

And add something from this.

and work a little digital magic and you get the picture above. I hope no one was seriously distressed by our above actions. Roy and I were just funnin you all. :tongue:

Now all I have to say is

Gocha!!!!! :grin: :grin: :grin:

NEUTRON · 01-29-2002, 07:23 AM

Ryan, is that you holding the nook is the last pic? Nice hog! South coast? It was out of character for Eggs, I was wondering when he would come clean. carp fishin

bait boy · 01-29-2002, 07:36 AM

Its ok ryan no need to redeem yourself in the eyes of BOE that fish he's holding looks like a 6-8 Lb steelhead anyway. maybe even smaller knowing the proportions of our short compadre :tongue:

Ramstrong · 01-29-2002, 07:50 AM

No, that springer is from Bob Ball's photo archive. None of my springer pictures looked quite that nice so I had to borrow one. I know there's no need to redeem him, I was just curios if we could get anyone to buy the story. Walt was all over it from the get go though. I actually was fishing with Roy before work when he caught that steelhead last March. It just isn't a springer.

fishbait · 01-29-2002, 03:47 PM

Hey, I still say Roy is not a cracker............

Man, look at the great fun we all had, picking on and defending my friend bait-o-eggs...

Soon the rivers will come back into shape and we will have better things to do with our time.

But unitl then..........

Gizmo Man · 01-29-2002, 04:53 PM

Ryan: You came clean real quick... What happened? You afraid that you where going to be caught perpetrating a fraud on us? You two kids...you know, you and Roy, start a fake post with a fake photo and then start a fake fight to invoke sympathy... For what? We all know Roy can't catch a salmon...he spent so much time last year tellling us he couldn't! Wouldn't you expect that if the day ever comes that he should catch one that at least 50 pics. of it would show up on the board. Now you come up with the lost pic of Roy?? In short...you are busted...you and Roy and your fake apology won't go far in my book :grin: :shocked: :tongue:

Giz...

:tongue:

Bait O' Eggs · 01-29-2002, 05:01 PM

Geezer, I am truely sorry :depressed: you are old, fat and bald. :tongue:

Do you accept that apology?

Ramstrong · 01-30-2002, 07:41 AM

Puleeze Walt,

The only reason we came clean so quickly was because of the large # of people that actually bought it. (You know who you are.

) Though there weren't posts made. As far as getting caught perpetrating a fraud, well a fraud it was. No perpetration, just execution of a plan. I wanted to see if one of my doctored photo's would pass as real. If your going to try, you might as well set your sights high. And what could be higher than trying to convince people that Roy actually caught a springer. :smile:
Now as far as being busted, slap on the cuffs old man. I think you do a good job of smack talkin, but I see very little action.

THE REEL HEY_YALL · 01-30-2002, 10:33 AM

I read something somewhere about "supple, pink panties......"

Like Roy said, 'pink' is not his favorite color. :tongue:

Do your old timers' wives set you up on the changing tables at bathrooms whenever you make a stinky? How many hips were broken during said process? :tongue: :grin:

Now Ramstrong, when you call Roy a stud, are you reading off of his resume that he gave to Farmer Johnson?

b-day after floatilla, so it looks like that would classify me in the 'superstar' category.

Gizmo Man · 01-30-2002, 11:16 PM

Ryan:Not only can I talk the smack...but it is obvious you have not been watching the hot tamele fishing show that last couple of weeks....no smack...just action....

Scott K. can back it up with video that is digitally enchanced... :smile:

what is biggest fish you have landed kid...and test line...

Mine is a 12' sturgeon on 25# leader, 30# main using a 10' canadian mooching reel and rod....took 1hr 6mins from hookup to release...

not bad for a geezer...want to see a pic of it jumping...have one of those... :smile:

Geezer...