Think you are having a bad day????

[Hogmaster]

Talk about quick thinking!!!

Click here for how to handle the power line drift!!

[ 01-28-2003, 03:02 PM: Message edited by: Hogmaster ]

[24 on/ 48 off]

My favorite line from the article:

"The driver of the other car, Justin B. Elam, of Olathe, Kansas, came immediately to check on Thompson.

"I just started saying, `Dude, turn off my car.' He looked around at first, he couldn't find me. Then he looked up and saw me," Thompson said."

That is FUNNY!

--spud-- :smile:

[Hogmaster]

I think that guy had a bad day.

Think you are having a bad day??

There was a case in one hospital's Intensive Care ward
where patients
always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at
about 11 A. M.,
regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled
the doctors and some
even thought that it had something to do with the
supernatural. No one
could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred
around 11 A. M. on
Sundays. So a worldwide team of experts was assembled
to investigate the
cause of the incidents. The next Sunday morning, a few
minutes before 11
A. M., all the doctors and nurses nervously wait
outside the ward to see
for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all
about. Some were
holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy
objects to ward off
the evil spirits. Just when the clock struck 11...
Pookie Johnson, The
part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and
unplugged the life
support system so that he could use the vacuum
cleaner.

Having a bad day?

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the
Exxon Valdez oil
spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony,
two of the most
expensively saved animals were being released back
into the wild amid
cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in
full view, a
killer whale ate them both.

Still think you are having a bad day?

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen
shaking
frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some
kind of wire running
from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending
to jolt him away
from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy
plank of wood,
breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment, he
had been happily
listening to his Walkman.

STILL think you're having a bad day?

Two animal rights protesters were protesting the
cruelty of sending
pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany. Suddenly,
all two thousand
pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence,
stampeding madly.
The two hopeless protesters were trampled to death.

What?! STILL having a bad day?

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough
postage on a letter
bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on
it. Forgetting it
was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.

There now, feeling better?

[ 01-28-2003, 03:01 PM: Message edited by: Hogmaster ]

[Hogmaster]

Of course there are the top 8 morons of 2002.

I suspect these folks almost always have bad days!

> >
> > 1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?
> > AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months,
> > saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received
> > a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not
> > Walter who's lacking intelligence.
> >
> > 2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS
> > Police in Oakland, California spent two hours
> > attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded
> > himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas
> > canisters, officers discovered that the man was
> > standing beside them in the police line, shouting,
> > "Please come out and give yourself up."
> >
> > 3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???
> > An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a
> > motorist and forced him to drive to two different
> > automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper
> > proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank
> > accounts.
> >
> > 4. THE GETAWAY!
> > A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and
> > asked for all the money in the cash drawer.
> > Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the
> > store clerk and worked the counter himself for three
> > hours until police showed up and grabbed him.
> >
> > 5. DID I SAY THAT???
> > Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery
> > suspect who just couldn't control himself during a
> > lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup
> > to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll
> > shoot," the man shouted, "that's not what I said!"
> >
> > 6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING?? A man spoke frantically into
> > the phone, >"My wife is pregnant and her contractions
> > are only two minutes apart!"
> > "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked.
> > "No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"
> >
> > 7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!! In Modesto,
> > California, Steven Richard King was arrested for
> > trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a
> > weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a
> > gun, but unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in
> > his pocket.
> >
> > 8. THE GRAND FINALE (I LOVE THIS ONE!!!) Last summer,
> > down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an
> > hour east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new
> > to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard
> > they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 ft
> > boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every
> > maneuver, no matter how much power was applied. After
> > about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted to
> > a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell
> > them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed
> > everything in perfect working condition. The engine
> > ran fine, the out drive went up and down, and the
> > propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of
> > the marina guys jumped in the water to check
> > underneath. He came up choking on water, he was
> > laughing so hard.
> >
> > NOW REMEMBER... THIS IS TRUE ... Under the boat, still
> > strapped securely in place, was the trailer.
> >
> > Does anyone else find it frightening the majority of these
> > took place in California??

[ 01-28-2003, 03:07 PM: Message edited by: Hogmaster ]

[KingFisher85]

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the
Exxon Valdez oil
spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony,
two of the most
expensively saved animals were being released back
into the wild amid
cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in
full view, a
killer whale ate them both

<font size="2" face="verdana,arial,helv">Oh good one hog

[lost_sailor]

Love those urban legends!

[skrimmy]

We need ONE MORE new forum....let's call it HOG HUMOR! Great stuff Gary! [img]graemlins/applause.gif[/img] Now you need to find a way to share that Eskimo Ice Fishing video! That was a hoot!

[Hogmaster]

Ahh, darn, lost_sailor!

They sound so good though!!!

And Skirvey, I know that it sure would be fun to post those videos! Talk about the need for DSL!

[Hogmaster]

OK, one more...

Raider Fan having a bad day -


&gt; Bob received a free ticket to the Superbowl from his company.
&gt; Unfortunately, when Bob arrived at the stadium he realized the seat was
&gt;in
&gt; the last row in the corner of the stadium. He was closer to the Goodyear
&gt; Blimp than the field!
&gt;
&gt; About halfway through the first quarter, Bob noticed an empty seat 10
&gt;rows
&gt; off the field right on the 50-yard line. He decided to take a chance and
&gt; made his way through the stadium and around the security guards to the
&gt; empty seat.
&gt;
&gt; As he sat down, he asked the gentleman sitting next to him, "Excuse me,
&gt;is
&gt; anyone sitting here?"
&gt; The man said "No."
&gt; Very excited to be in such a great seat for the game, Bob said to the man
&gt; next to him, "This is incredible! Who in their right mind would have a
&gt; seat like this at the Superbowl and not use it?!"
&gt;
&gt; The man replied, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed
&gt; to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Superbowl we
&gt; haven't been to together since we got married in 1967."
&gt;
&gt; "That's really sad," said Bob, "but still, couldn't you find someone to
&gt; take the seat? A relative or a close friend?"
&gt;
&gt; "No," the man replied, "they're all at the funeral."

[OceanBlue]

Bad day?! I'm thinking the guy in the story from the original post here had a very GOOD day! All's well that ends well!