I Love a Limerick

[Noah II]

I truly do. A few minutes ago I was reading something by id Painter and this just popped into my head.

I love home-canned Tuna Fish
It's a most delectable dish
To go out on the Blue
And catch just a few
Is truly my most fervent Wish

Anyone else have any? Any favorites the censers will let pass.
Jim

[Point-of-Sale Clerk]

A canny young fisher named Fisher
Once fished from the edge of a fissure.
A fish with a grin
Pulled the fisherman in ---
Now they're fishing the fissure for Fisher.

I went fishing offshore catching grunions.
Now my feet are all sore from my bunions!
But those fish fry up nice
With some butter, red spice,
Some black pepper, white wine and green onions!

While fishing I caught me a squid;
It implored me, "Don't cook me." (It did.)
Then with tentacles flung
Round my body it clung ...
With affection I christened it Sid.

Like my tuna poem

Loves to eats dem tunni
Tunni what I loves to eat
Spike dey little brains out
Wallow in dey blood with my feet

[Mark Mc]

These crack me up! Hey ***, I had to read the Fisher / fissure one in front of a speech class in college 20 - some years ago!

This one is not fishing related, but a favorite:

There once was a girl named Stella
who fell in love with a bow-legged fella
when the loving chap
let her sit on his lap
she fell right through to the cella

[skein]

I once hooked my bait through the spine,
And lowered it deep in the brine,
Then making a wish,
That included a fish,
I jigged til one jumped on the line.

Skein

[Mello-Yello]

There was a young fisher from Nome,
Who once tried to write a small poem.
At first it was fun,
But when he was done,
His poem didn't rhyme very good........

:shocked:

[jocose]

A salty ive always dreamt to be
To fish upon the deep blue sea
Riding swells and matching wits with the fishery
Swapping tales of glory with the likes of ye
A salty one day, i too shall be. jocose

[Reel Creel]

Keta , that rocks ill give it a 10 [img]graemlins/program.gif[/img]

[CATCH AND EAT]

Chris, :tongue: BTW proudly, I was not "towed in". Mighty Cindy Lou coasted into the dock....literally. :smile:


Breaker, breaker could I get a bar report please?
This is Tacklebuster scratch'in at the sandfleas.
This is the Coast Guard what do you need?
and why cross the bar in that half pint steed?
Tacklebuster here and I resent that remark,
for this boat is mighty but the waves are so dark.
Then stay in the river my sled headed friend,
and fish near Hammond, just around the bend.
But it's salt I crave and coho to slaughter,
I have my wife, my dog and my two daughters.
Stay inside, be safe, be content to fish,
Catch And Eat will report where to find the fish.


Hey Bernie, where's the fishies. Here's the coordinites Chris. he he he. :grin: :grin:

[ 10-15-2003, 01:50 PM: Message edited by: CATCH AND EAT ]

[Miss B Haven]

TB- I thought Limericks were just fictional fancy, looks like yours is based on true fact to me! :grin: Kind of a biography thing. Hmmm.... Historical Poetry (or is that Histerical?)

[Tacklebuster]

[img]graemlins/applause.gif[/img]

We gotta plan a sturgie trip soon Bernie, I'm looking forward to it

Mel- You know what they say, it's the true stuff that's always the funniest

[ 10-15-2003, 01:54 PM: Message edited by: Tacklebuster ]

How come the only limerics that I can come up with involve a woman from a coastal New England town? :shocked:

[CATCH AND EAT]

Originally posted by Keta:
How come the only limerics that I can come up with involve a woman from a coastal New England town? :shocked:

<font size="2" face="verdana,arial,helv">Chowder???? [img]graemlins/lurk.gif[/img]

Chris you are right. Sturgeon at 70+ feet. Ready? Cast!!!!!! tink tink tink, swoosh, tink tink swoosh, tink tink tink swoosh (strike 3) tink tink fish on!!!

Mel, :tongue:

[ 10-15-2003, 02:50 PM: Message edited by: CATCH AND EAT ]

[Noah II]

Nine more months before Tuna Time?
I don't think I'm gonna make it.
At least not Sane (If I ever was)

Everybody seen these already?

No zebras did board Noah's ark
Only horses, two white, and two dark
But for forty black nights
There were no bedroom lights
Which caused zebras galore to disbark

What a marvellous bird is the pelican
His beak can hold more than his belly can
He can hold in his beak
Enough food for a week
I'll be darned if I know how the hellecan

limericks pack laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical
But the good ones I've seen
So seldom are clean
And the clean ones so seldom are comical

[CATCH AND EAT]

Eating TUNA is so very fine,
a true gift from the Father Devine.
To the ocean we go in search of prey,
hoping for full totes at the end of day.
Yes catching TUNA is my favorit past time.

[Mr. Fisherman]

Tuna Tuna in the Brine,
I want to hook you
and make you mine
Feed on bait within them books
I'll reel you in and Give ye a looks
I'll spike you atop yer silvery head
and bleed you out, yea you'll be dead
I'll cut, you bleed you
Cark you , EAT YOU
And too the crabs
I'll promptly feed you
You'll rest up high
upon my shelves
till Santa delivers you with his elfs
To the good lil girls and boys
who lack all the toys
And the willingness of the Salty Dog Boys

Unill we meet
and my rod bends
remember this greetin'
fer tis' the END

[Tacklebuster]

There once lived a man they call Catch and Eat
His breath always smelled like his feet
He was Captain of the mighty Cindy Lou
He rigged her up to go chase Tuna on the blue
He sailed west from the dock
He smelled smoke and heard a loud knock
The Coast Guard towed him in
As the others boats heckled him he held up his chin
Trailered his boat...The End :shocked:

[Mark Mc]

OK, here goes:

"Ode to the tunaholic ER Nurse"


I once knew a woman named Nancy
Whose boat was all bloody not fancy
With a day job as a nurse
to support her fish curse
'twas just like a book by Tom Clancy

[Mello-Yello]

[img]graemlins/applause.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/applause.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/applause.gif[/img]

[skein]

I once knew a guy named Mark Mc
Who put lots of fish in the sack
He shared what he knew
With the Salty Dog crew
And made them all want to go back!

'Tis true, Mark, and thanks!

And for Popeye:

The Cap'n of the Julie Rose III
Took Ifishers fishing for free
He once talked of heaven
With V, VI, and VII
A fleet to head out on the sea!

Skein

[ 10-17-2003, 08:24 AM: Message edited by: skein ]

[Mark Mc]

Aaawww, gee Skein, thanks! Here's one for you...


There once was a guy named Skein
who was always friendly not mean
when he spiked his first tuna
it thrashed to Laguna
for he spiked not the brain but the spleen

[Miss B Haven]

Originally posted by Keta:
How come the only limerics that I can come up with involve a woman from a coastal New England town? :shocked:

<font size="2" face="verdana,arial,helv">Hey- we should put our heads together on this, cause all mine are about a GUY from New Englund! :shocked:

Lets see... 1 Keta head x 1 Miss B head. [img]graemlins/idea.gif[/img]
Just what is zero times zero? [img]graemlins/stupid.gif[/img] :grin:

[CATCH AND EAT]

Busting breakers, enduring wind chop,
Miss B. and Minaki fish through the slop.
C&E reeling in tuna and Keta bleeding them dry,
did anyone notice he had blood in his eye?
Cark on, cark on, cark on, chop, chop, chop.

[Noah II]

Here's one for Pilar
Looking for a Smile here buddy :smile:

An ifisher by name of Pilar,
Chased theives away with his car,
"When I catch em I'll kill 'em
And then I'll distill 'em,
And take them to jail in a jar,"

[ 10-17-2003, 10:19 AM: Message edited by: Noah II ]

I stumbled into this one and thought of Mis B. I don't know who the author is :grin:

&lt;email Keta for the full limerick&gt;

This one is a little "outside" the boundaries and had to go on the chopping block. :grin:

Re edit by Keta
:shocked: It wasn't that bad :shocked:
Just ask Ann Onymous :grin:

[ 10-17-2003, 04:36 PM: Message edited by: Keta ]

[OceanBlue]

Noah II - Pilar will like that one! :grin: He's too busy with work right now to get out here, but I'll read it to him when he gets his head out of the controls he's building long enough to listen.

[Birdnest]

I captain a fine Ed Wing,
All DipSeaDiver could say was cha-ching.
Work was a pain.
I answer to Skein.
After a couple of beers I think I can sing.


Hey it's Ray on the Sea Lion
Motor troubles had me crying
Seduced by a fluzy
I purchased a Suzy
Next year a Honda I'll be buying


Bought a new shiney boat
To my friends I began to gloat
We had a new baby
Wife says maybe
I'll be lucky if I ever see her float.

Joe

[ 10-18-2003, 08:04 AM: Message edited by: Birdnest ]

[Miss B Haven]

TUNA TUNA TUNA
TUNA TUNA TUNA


TUNA TUNA TUNA
TUNA TUNA TUNA

TUNA TUNA TUNA
TUNA TUNA TUNA
:whazzup:

At least it rhymes! [img]graemlins/stupid.gif[/img]

[Birdnest]

I float around in a 34 Tolly
All the girls say by gosh by golly
My name is Mel
I am living well
I think that red head's name was Molly.

[Birdnest]

I once answered to Pilar's Mate
When it comes to fishing I am never late
And now it's Ocean Blue
It's just something I wanted to do
If you want to find me I'll be fishin' with Pilar the Great

There was once an old man and the sea
Fighting a great fish, that sounds like me
I love fishing with Ocean Blue
I always learn something new
If you respect the ocean you will live to be 93.

Joe

[Birdnest]

Sorry, a few more. :grin:

There lives a fella named DepoeBayDan
To catch the first fish he'll sleep in his van.
His limit he's baggin'
He won't tolerate snaggin'
That ol' DepoeBay seems like a good man.

Joe

[CATCH AND EAT]

Originally posted by Miss B Haven:
TUNA TUNA TUNA
TUNA TUNA TUNA


TUNA TUNA TUNA
TUNA TUNA TUNA

TUNA TUNA TUNA
TUNA TUNA TUNA
:whazzup:

At least it rhymes! [img]graemlins/stupid.gif[/img]

<font size="2" face="verdana,arial,helv">Awe yes the first sounds of insanity. [img]graemlins/1zhelp.gif[/img]

[ 10-20-2003, 08:43 AM: Message edited by: CATCH AND EAT ]

[FishBowl]

I fished with that ER nurse named Nancy
and yes her boat isn't fancy
but she'll endure the wind chop
to de-virgin her flock
then cark all them tuna at the dock.

Tim

[Sea Jypzee]

[img]graemlins/applause.gif[/img] :grin: .