Andiamo new-guy story

andiamo · 05-19-2003, 07:29 PM

My fishing buddy says that there is an unwritten expectation for new members to post an interesting tale about themselves. I figured I would pull out an old diving story to entertain you folks, and maybe meet a few salty dogs that actually get salty (divers).
The attached picture is of the biggest thing I ever harvested while diving. The octopus was 9.5 feet from tentacle tip to tentacle tip across the body, weighing about 50 pounds.
The tale starts off at Sucia Island, in December of '82 (I'm not really that old, I just got certified when I was 15). My dive buddy and I were hunting for ling cod, scanning for that tell-tale long body, hiding among the boulder tops and crevases. While crusing at 50' my buddy started to frantically point toward the bottom directly below us. I thought for sure he saw a huge ling cod, and was afraid to shoot it with the pole spear he had. I scanned for those tell-tale ling cod outlines where he was pointing, and could not see a thing. Then I saw the cat-slit eyes, then the hood, then the legs! Wayyyy Cool, I thought. I handed my pole spear to my buddy, explained with criptic diving communication that he was to control my bouyancy and keep my regulator in my mouth if I lost the use of my arms, then hovered down on the octopus. I grabbed the octopus on either side of his body, gripping a leg in each hand as hard as I could, expecting a violent escape effort from the beast. Instead, he just sat there. My buddy inflated my BCD (40#lift); he didn't budge. I jerked up and down until he started to budge. After putting my foot on the bottom and squat lifting him off the bottom, he pulled up arm-fulls of rocks. My buddy stripped them off his legs one by one until we started to rise (from 60'). I held the octopus as far from my mask and regulator as I could, with my arms outstretched and my face turned as far away as possible. During the slow (controlled if you can believe it) ascent to the top, my buddy vented my BCD, and the octopus started to work on me.
The octopus first grabbed a fin and pulled. When a 50# octopus grabs a large flat rubber surface, he keeps it until he is done with it. He next got ahold of my tank. Like a constrictor snake, he pulled and gained pernanent ground every time I gave a tiny bit of slack. By the time I reached the surface, the octopus' head was near my tank, he completely had my fin (with my contorted leg), but I still had him with the same 2-handed, white-knuckled grip I started with. When we neared the boat he rolled a free arm or 2 toward the bottom of my boat. NO WAY I thought, and rolled downward to avoid having to cut his arm from my boat bottom.
OK my fellow virtual fisherman/diving buddies, how would you get this bugger in your boat if you were me???????

I'll check back to see what you come up with, and finish my story after enjoying a few ideas.

Mello-Yello · 05-19-2003, 07:41 PM

Ok, Ok, I think I know this one...

You swam over next to your buddy. The octopus climbs onto your buddy. You climb in the boat, harpoon your buddy, and drag him into the boat, octopus attached! Yes?

andiamo · 05-20-2003, 04:49 AM

...A very thoughtful idea. Your suggestion does not violate any Washington State Fish and Game rules that I am aware of. It is illegal to puncture or cut an octopus while taking it, but I see no mention on dive buddies (dive buddies must fall under the non-sport-fish catagory).
But no, I didn't use that method.

Hummingbird · 05-20-2003, 05:19 AM

You reached over and grabbed the radio mike ,got on channel 78 and called for CAPT. KJ and The "BLACK ROCKET". :grin: JK . Sounds like a hectic situation though, Welcome aboard. I am really curiuos now. Tight Lines. Tom

Mr. Fisherman · 05-20-2003, 08:25 AM

Ya bit his ear and he turned into a puddle of goo

Where on earth is his ear anyway?

Did ya get any mud in your eye?

No, I suspect you "allowed" him to slip into something more comfortable, like a dark box or bag then tossed it into the boat for the bundle of blob rodeo....

O.K., how did ya do it and welcomme to the board.

Where chemicals used... Better living through chemicals ya know...

Maybe ya put the air to him?

Ya better just fess up before we start jotting down things tha get edited and chewed out...

Hey, maybe ya really did chew on him....

Sky-Guy · 05-20-2003, 09:21 AM

I would think that you put something else in the water that was more attractivbe than yourself for him to latch onto.. Like a bouy or something similar, then hoist him in the rig.

Slow Roll · 05-20-2003, 09:23 AM

Ok, first question, what did you do with it? I have tried octopus several times and I don't particulary enjoy it.
Second, can't they bite you with that parrot beak? Can you say ouch!! :shocked:

Hmmm, do octopus like beer? Tease it into the boat with a six pack of Schlitz maybe?

I think Mr. F's idea of giving it someplace dark to hide has merit.

Paul B.

fish assassin · 05-20-2003, 09:26 AM

How about: You stuck your thumb in the hole on the top of its head and when it
started to suffer from oxygen depravation you flipped it over the side of the
boat and took him home for octopussy stew?? :grin: :grin: :grin:

-assAssin-

Threemuch · 05-20-2003, 10:10 AM

I am guessing that you killed it in situ, since it's definitely dead in the picture. I know two methods, one is to bite the area between the eyes. This is pretty nasty, and I would worry about asphixiation with something this big. The other is to turn it's head inside out. This is what I would try.

Mark Mc · 05-20-2003, 10:56 AM

Hey Phil, after all these months of resistance you finally joined the club! Welcome! I will point out that it is rather devious to post an old photo, showing you in your youthful appearance. The Salty Dogs should know that you look a little older, due to normal aging in addition to having Big Boat Headaches. Here's the real Phil and his mistress:

andiamo · 05-20-2003, 09:45 PM

Wow! A valiant effort by all! But....
-I had no VHF on my first boat (Dad's 18' Olympic with 105 Chrysler outboard), so I couldn't hail the Black Rocket on 78. I bet the Black Rocket's hull design wasn't even a dream in '82 anyway.
-I didn't use any chemicals. Some naughty divers use bleach to get octopus from their holes, but the Washington game regs DO forbid the use of chemicals. Besides, it was a LOT more fun violently ripping the octopus off the bottom with a hundred pounds of rocks dangling from his legs.
-Pumping air into him may have killed him... or really ****ed him off! I didn't think of that option.
-I didn't try to coax him onto any other "more attractive thing". Sound's like a technique that would require a lot more patients than a studly 17-year-old would have. Also, the octopus seem MOST attracted to me, or at least my SCUBA gear.
-The parrot-like beak was a concern. When we skinned/processed him we found that the beak was at least an inch in diameter, and I'm sure it could have easily penetrated a dive suit. This is one of the primary reasons my grip was "white-knuckled" and ALWAYS remained gripped on both sides of his head, with my arms locked outstretched.
-Beer??!! Aboard a boat with two 17 year-old buddies camping in the San Juans??!! OK OK we did have some beer aboard, but there is no way I would feed my contraband to my future seafood!
-I wouldn't know how to suffocate an octopus, but I have used the suffocation method to control a 28# ling cod I speared in Deception Pass; it took about 40 seconds to make him as limp as a noodle with both gill plates held shut (Another story for another time).
-"Threemuch" gets the prize for what I may have attempted IF I wasn't able to to what I did. My second choice would have been to bite the octopus between the eyes. My boss at the time (owner of Anacortes Diving and Supply) routinely used this method to crush an octopus' brains while abiding the law of "no punctures, cutting or chemicals".

Well, what do you say I give it one more day of ideas, then I will finish my story.
p.s. I left a clue in my responses above.

Mello-Yello · 05-20-2003, 09:59 PM

Ok, Ok, I really got it now!

You told the Octopus one of my jokes and bored him to death!!!

MarlinMark · 05-21-2003, 12:08 AM

Let me guess....You crushed his brain by hitting him in the head with one of his own legs w/rock attached.

Mark

MarlinMark · 05-21-2003, 12:09 AM

Would you please explain how you prepared and consumed a 9 1/2 foot Octopus?

Mark

Capin' Dan · 05-21-2003, 05:08 AM

Ok Ok, you went and got a girl octopus and coaxed him in the boat that way. I also like Mr. Fishermans idea of biting his ear off.
Also I would like to welcome you to our board with that said you are a cruel cruel person for making us wait.

Bait O' Eggs · 05-21-2003, 06:18 AM

You took all 8 legs and tied it in a figure 8

(they do have 8 legs dont they?

)

I would have talked my buddy into biting it between the eyes [img]graemlins/1zhelp.gif[/img]

You swam to shore and crawled up on the beach giving the octopus nothing to get ahold of.

Once the octopus is to the surface can you puncture it? lasso and harpoon this critter

Albacore Tuna Captain · 05-21-2003, 08:17 AM

Welcome aboard! You'll find this bunch of SD's real entertaining. I love their replies to all matters.

Me......since I'm an old diver too, I would have left him alone!!! [img]graemlins/berry.gif[/img] Geeeze, those big octopi give me the willys! [img]graemlins/eek13.gif[/img] So you got him into the boat by rubbing his belly like you do a big butt fish? Wait, they don't have a belly! I know, you took one leg, threw it into the boat and then stared at him in the eyes. He took the only path to escape and crawled into the boat himself.....right!??? Come onnnn......tell us!

Threemuch · 05-21-2003, 08:37 AM

I looked for your clue, and didn't see one. Maybe something about the 100 pounds of rocks? Did you beat him to death with a big rock?

I gotta laugh at all you guys that wonder what you do with an octopus. Besides being great halibut bait, it's good eats. Ever heard of Tako? Octopus is good and commands a pretty good price in most parts of the world. There are lots of ways to prepare it marinated, but with a beasty like that I would have steaked the upper arms into 1/4 to 3/8" slices, pounded them to relaxation and grilled them with a little pepper and lemon, or battered and fried the steaks. Kept the lower portions of the arms for bait. Cut the hood up into strips for marinating and smoking.

I don't scuba much, I mostly freedive. I don't think I would go after an octopus of this size. Certainly big enough to keep you underwater longer than you want to stay.

KB

[ 05-21-2003, 09:38 AM: Message edited by: Threemuch ]

PeterMac · 05-21-2003, 08:45 AM

Did you smack him silly on the Chrysler 105 outboard? :whazzup:

PeterMac

Bait O' Eggs · 05-21-2003, 09:31 AM

Since he already had your fin in one tenticle, you took off your other fin and put in in tenticle #2, your mask in teticle #3, tank in tenticle #4, your buddies left fin in tenticle #5, your buddies right fin in tenticle #6, buddies tank in tenticle #7, buddies mask in tenticle #8, you put your finger around his beak and let him bite, then pulled him in the boat :shocked:

I know what I would have done and it would have include piercing the skin in multiple spots :shocked: :shocked: :shocked: Jeff Dohmer would have nothing on my dismantling an octopus technique.

seastripes · 05-21-2003, 10:07 AM

You probably don't even remember because your 'buddies' started whacking at its head from the boat with dock hooks and things and with beer laced accuracy, well, missed a couple o' times?

Miss B Haven · 05-21-2003, 10:47 AM

I know, I know!!! You hired this guy to get him in the boat! :grin:

Copyright - Corrirod - 2003! :grin:

[ 05-21-2003, 12:39 PM: Message edited by: Miss B Haven ]

andiamo · 05-21-2003, 08:30 PM

Wow! I'm gonna love being part of the Salty Dogs crew! Thanks for all the welcome, great entertainment and (mostly useless) ideas for landing a big octopus!
Answers to the last round of ideas:
-No death-causing jokes were used.
-No bludgeoning with rocks.
-No octopus sexual attraction methods were used.
-No leg knots.
-Bait O'Eggs had a great idea of bringing him to shore. I have used that method to salvage an anchor that was too heavy to lift with my bouyancy capability (walked along the bottom to shore). A shore landing certainly sounds safer than putting one's face next to all those tentacles to bite his face!
-If I ever do catch another octopus, I'm bringing it over to Threemuch's house for dinner; his recipes sound good! My mom used similar tenderizing and marinading techniques. We also ground some of it and made fritters (always a good way to deal with chewy critters).
-The affectionately violent Sumo wrestler is a good idea, but I couldn't have afforded him/her when I was 17.
-The clue I left (all be it weak) was the octopus' attraction to my gear.
-Bait O' Eggs was the closest with the "gear portion" of his idea.

Have a virtual pint of Rogue Mocha Porter, on me!

Here is the rest of the story:
I had my dive buddy inflate my bouyancy compensator, take off my weight belt, put the polespears and my weight belt in the boat and release the fin that the octopus had from my foot. I had him release my tank straps and climb in the boat. I rolled the octopus/tank/fin (assembly) in front of me, and with several violent one-legged kicks, a lunge with my arms, and my dive buddy pulling from inside the boat, we managed to get the whole package onto the floor of the boat (yuk!). The octopus eventually let go of the gear (they loose their effectiveness when gravity starts to work on them). We then put him (maybe a better verb is, "oozed" him) into a good size cooler, which he almost completely filled....

A legal harvest of the beast from Sucia Island!

It's been a real pleasure chatting. I hope to see you all on the water! Thanks again for the notes of welcome and good fun.

Andiamo i.e. Phil Burkum