The world of family cancer ( ie a maggot who takes from parents )

[toas243]

I have one in my family she keeps taking and taking from my mom ,but my mom will not ,do any thing to stop this ,a little out my sister she is a ******* ,I think that explains it ,I have gone to the state officials but ,since my Mom does nothing ,to bolster my attempts ,my sister forges checks has my Mom intraped in her own home ,but still does nothing ,Oh yeah my sister has a son living here ( So Cal ) ,and the stae has taken him to my brothers house ,and the state expects my brothers house to be perfect like no windex or 409 cleaners,for the safety of the child ,btw the boy is a 12 year old and a great kid ,I swear the government is more for the criminals than the victims rights ,,,,,,,,, Oh I could rant a rave more ,but you get the picture umpkin:

[Got One!]

Its a sad situation. Meth just removes the morals from you brain, and they get to the point where nothing they do is wrong (meaning to a *******, they know no wrong, it doesnt exist in their brain any longer, its gone) Your Mom should read up on it if she can so she can understand what is going on. Its not the daughter she knew, and she needs to get a restraining order on your sis and custody of her child.

Really sorry to hear that has got into your or anyone elses family. The world needs to ban those chemicals.

[Pilar]

Sorry to hear it. Try a group called Tough love. They are a parent advocacy group. Meetings cost like 5 bucks and you will find other adults dealing with problem kids. Even 'kids' that never left home or returned to terrorize thier parents. I went to one in the Hawthorne district and they helped me a single parent with an out of control child.

Many parents and elders are faced with these issues.

They will stand with your mom and help her solve this problem. She needs help. The ******* needs help too but is still in freefall not wanting help. Removal of her meal ticket may be the bump in the road that makes her seek it.

Please at least call them, they can help you, I kid you not.

Don't ask me how I know this.

Originally Posted by toas243

I have one in my family she keeps taking and taking from my mom ,but my mom will not ,do any thing to stop this ,a little out my sister she is a ******* ,I think that explains it ,I have gone to the state officials but ,since my Mom does nothing ,to bolster my attempts ,my sister forges checks has my Mom intraped in her own home ,but still does nothing ,Oh yeah my sister has a son living here ( So Cal ) ,and the stae has taken him to my brothers house ,and the state expects my brothers house to be perfect like no windex or 409 cleaners,for the safety of the child ,btw the boy is a 12 year old and a great kid ,I swear the government is more for the criminals than the victims rights ,,,,,,,,, Oh I could rant a rave more ,but you get the picture ,I can`t wait when the open ******* season with Yotes umpkin:

[Keeper]

I am going to guess you will find quite a few ifishers that have experience with drug addicts in their families. In my family, it is my niece. In my husband's family it is his sister, brother and now two of his sister's adult kids.

I could tell a few stories that would make us all cringe but it wouldn't change anything. The media blitz tells us these ******** can be rehabilitated. No, they can't. They just go to rehab to avoid jail or because it is winter and they need a warm place to stay.

They will suck the life out of our parents and there is little we can do about it. Our parents are adults and quite capable of making their own choices. Unfortunately, those choices don't seem to include slamming the door in a loved ones face. I have heard "they were hungry" or "I didn't give them money, I only bought them gas, food, cigs"...etc. Yes, I have explained that only gives the user more money for meth.

My husband's Mom will be having them all over for Thanksgiving dinner, including the one that has a restraining order keeping him AWAY from there. We will not be attending.

BTW - According to my Mom; I am a cold hearted person

[latesvak]

keeper . i feel your pain but i disagree with you on a couple things . i myself was a "*******" once . i got arrested for possesion and under the influance . a felony and a misdemenor (SP) . i did my year in drug court and i even had to go into court to see the judge every wednesday at 8 am for a year straight . i was bad . realy bad . dont know if you know how bad this is but i was doing an 8 ball by myself every two days .

to really tell you the truth it was not the charges or the court or the rehab that made me want to change . it was the sitting on the curb of a major street with my hands cuffed and the cops looking through everything . i even had to take my shoes and socks off . . . mind you this was 11 days after my 18th birthday . i admit it was all a stupid thing to do . .. but i (when i was using ) supported my own habit . i NEVER ever stole things to buy drugs . never used my parents . hell my mom even made me use my own money to post bail ( it was $5000$ ).
you said that (The media blitz tells us these ******** can be rehabilitated. No, they can't. They just go to rehab to avoid jail or because it is winter and they need a warm place to stay. ) i can say that it might be like that for some people but i know its not like that for alot . i do understand that it can and does take over your life but it can be over powered .....



toas243 .not sure if you have but try and contact a the city but they should have some sort of drug councling / family service department .
and about the child . not trying to be mean here but would it be better for the child to be at your brothers house or with c.p.s .


please feel free to pm me if there are any questions or if you need any help




best wishes

luke

[HntnFsh]

Latesvak,
Congratulations on your recovery,life change.Thats a tough 1 to beat.Seen it first hand on
a few occasions with family memebers.Hold your head high.



Keeper,
Call the cops when that person is there.It can be anonymous.

I bet my stories could top your stories Kidding.It can get extremely bizzare though.

[Keeper]

Luke, I am real glad you were able to kick the meth habit.

Unfortunately, our little group of addicts LOVE the stuff. Oh sure, they get clean for a couple of months, everybody gets their hopes up and then BAM!

Please forgive my bitterness, you see my family has been dealing with our addict (age 28) for 12 years. My husband's family has been dealing with theirs (ages 45, 41, 20 & 18) for over 20. All have been to jail, one got hosed off by the hazmat team in front of her neighbors, three have been through rehab repeatedly, two have watched their Mom and Uncle work the system and seem to think they can too.

It is very frustrating to watch your aging parents go through this. You can talk until you are blue but they still open the door and let them and their friends in. They will feed them, buy cigs, even gas in the car or let them crash in a bed! Always hoping and praying that this time it will be different.

[PapaHog]

Keeper you have to believe in something and to believe they can not be helped will not help. They can be helped. They can. I know, I was there in hell for more years than I care to count. Crank takes over and it looks to everyone around you that you will never come back. Your morals have gone and you really don't care about anything or anybody except for the love of the drug. That your going to die from the drug is a given, the only questions are when and how many people will be hurt in the process. I have known people that said someone as bad off as I was could never come back.

Thank God they were wrong.

My sister and my best friend never doubted that I was a good person. Never stopped believing I could be helped. Paid bail, rehab, food, lodging and clothes believing in me that I would somehow someway find a way out of the hell I was in and was putting them through.

Then I met a girl in the same pit I was in. Her family, mom and dad, brother and sister never once gave up on her. They did the same for her my friend and sister did for me. They kept helping her and praying for her and paying her way at least as far as food clothing lodging and utilities were concerned.

Together my sweet lovable Diana and I crawled slowly out of that hole we were in. We found jobs and good jobs. We gave up all our drug world friends. We had been clean for 20 plus years and doing very well. Driving paid for cars, paying into retirement, good vacations, long weekends at the beach, in fact living the good life. Everything was great and a year and a half ago my wife died of a sudden death heart attack in her sleep in bed beside me. Everyone, except for my sister and best friend thought and even said I would go back to drugs.

But they were wrong.

So keeper, I know where you are and where you have been. I know where they are and where they are headed. I know where their parents are coming from for I have been there and done that. Please don't ever give up on them. Take care of you and yours first and foremost but they are family and need more than anything for someone to believe in them and help them when they need help.


A lot of drug addicts, I am sure just like me, make a comeback and become successful contributing members of society.

I agree with you that the cards are stacked against them and it is a tough uphill road but it can be done. I have been there and done that.

There but for the Grace of Almighty God go I.

[fishkisser]

Cleaned up myself a long time ago ... Wouldn't be here to say it if I didn't ... Sometimes you just have to hit bottom before you can climb back up......Barney

[Dullhook]

The wonderful testimonies above prove that it's never too late and there's always hope for all of us!

Sometimes you just have to hit bottom before you can climb back up......Barney

Barney makes an important point here. Usually we have to hit a true bottom before we will reach out for help. For myself, even family, jail, and well-intentioned counseling had no effect because the healing had to come from within. This is a tough world that we live in and all of us are searching for love, truth, and purpose in life...and are often deceived into looking for them in all the wrong places. As long as we make "ourselves" the main focus of this life we will always be searching in quiet desperation.

I finally (after 50 years) found healing, peace, and purpose in life after turning my heart over to Jesus Christ and having a personal relationship with Him. I can tell you that this has nothing to do with religion. He can and will walk into those places of sin and failure and wipe the slate clean giving us a new beginning. Nobody is beyond hope and it's never too late for anyone in His eyes. If a loser like myself could be rescued... anyone can. His Word at the bottom of my signature says this:

"Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your soul. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." Amen.

[retaliate]

Seems there is one in many family's, & Mom's are espically gullible, my Mom has little to offer, but still is taken advantage off, she knows the situation, altho it took years even when she was warned well ahead of time, but I guess her Motherly instincts are too strong or is it weak, Sadly I think this is all too common.

[jvp]

Originally Posted by Keeper

I The media blitz tells us these ******** can be rehabilitated. No, they can't.

not hardly. rehab is more than just possible.

[PapaHog]

Rehab works but you got to want it to work. Hitting bottom does not work. Trust me. I hit bottom lots of times. I mean really on the bottom. I had court ordered rehab and then a year of out patient care. Did it work NO not on your life it did not work. I was doing drugs for the whole year and even managed drugs on the inside more than once.

By now you think I am crazy. I say rehab works then tell you how bad I was during rehab. All thats the truth, so help me God.

Rehab showed me a better way and gave me the tools to climb out of the pit of hate and with out hope, a living hell on earth.

Without the tools and tricks I learned in rehab I never would have been able to come back and be a productive member of society. the never ending trust and care that my little sister and best friend gave me allowed me to live long enough to finally put the tools to work. Tools that they paid for. Tools that saved my life.

I do not consider myself a recovering addict but a healed addict. I have no need to recover from anything now, I am healthy and on the right path to eternity.

Why me? Easy answer. A little sister and a best friend that never gave up on me but did everything they could to keep me alive so that one day I might become who I am today. I like me and love my little sister and best friend more than life itself.

Family is important, it is all the addict has between him/her and hell on earth.

[Dullhook]

my Mom has little to offer, but still is taken advantage off, she knows the situation,

You are very fortunate to have such a wonderful mother with a kind caring heart, Ken. Her methods may be questioned by some but her intentions can not. She obviously loves her children very much putting them above her own financial needs. She may not have much to offer materially but is giving them something much more substantial. Her unconditional love and support. In time this will win out because the afflicted person knows that your mom will always be there for him/her no matter what. God bless her!

[retaliate]

My Brother(other) had a bad Drug problem back in the 80's, & spent 4 1/2 years in a Federal Pen as a result, in this case you can call it Corrections Facility, cause he got his act together, took advantage of the Prison Education system & is/has been living a normal life ever since, also my Daughter had a bad problem when she was 16, she was about to be sent to a live in re-hab facility, when she figured out we weren't goint to put up with her, or her older Boyfriend, she decided she didn't want that life, & cleaned up on her own, I'm proud of both my brother & my Daughter, I beleive will power win's over addiction, at least for some.

[Thumper]

You know, this thread has changed my life. I have always assumed that a ******* today is a ******* forever. Until he or she dies alone in the street somewhere or at the muzzle of some homeowners gun.

What I am hearing here, though, is very optimistic. For some, such an addiction can lead to genuine recovery.

I congratulate you as the real winners in life!!

You are an inspiration to us all. And you have changed my perceptions about this important subject. Thank you.

[latesvak]

yuo know sometimes its really nice to hear the things like thumper said up there . and toas243 i was just wondering if there was any update on whats going on ?
keeper. have you tried to call the cops and turn them in . if nothing they can still get them for under the infulence . and hold em for a while . i belive what pappa hog said holds alot of truth (Rehab works but you got to want it to work) . if you dont want it to work like in my situation it wont . i myself thought it was a joke . i went to all the meetings thinking that i was better then all these people . but i was'nt . i now realize that we all have our own personal stories and past .
i think that it all comes down to the person themselves to determin the time they want to stop using .
and another thing .. its been 12 years . i have not touched it in 12 whole years . oddly enough sometimes while walking down the street or in a certain spot i can smell it . i dont know why or if its my mind making it up but for a minute split seccond i want it again . not that i would really ever touch it again . and its also wierd how your mind decides to rember all the good times you had while on it . but the times when it is 4 in the morning and it would make to much noise to vaccum so you grab a wisk broom and try to (sweep) the carpet clean in your room . ....... it is an awful drug .

the best part i thnk was when i was in court and had to see the counsler she told me i had a.d.d . and tried to put me on reddlin . i said no i wont take a legal version of the drug your trying to get me off of ...... well i had to spend the day in jail for not obaying the counsler but then judge said i was right and did not have to take it . glag that was setteled ....... oh well sorry for the rant . i really like this thread and some of the stories on here . i wish everyone the best of luck



luke

[Threemuch]

Congrats to all the addicts on this thread who have overcome adversity. Prayers for those with friends and family members still afflicted.

I started another thread, not wanting to hijack this one, because I really want to know why anyone would try meth. Crazy stuff.