Born to be Wild
05-28-2003, 02:05 AM
Hope some of you appreciate this because I had to really search through the old archives to find this! Maybe you have read this before my time with PC's 2 years ago.
And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and
spinach and green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman
would live long and healthy lives.
So Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99 cent
double cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with that?"
And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds.
And God created the healthful yogurt, that Woman might keep her figure that
man found so fair.
So Satan froze the yogurt, and he brought forth chocolate, nuts and rightly
colored sprinkle candy to put on the yogurt. And Woman gained pounds.
And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."
So Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon bits, and shredded cheese.
And there was ice cream for dessert. And Woman gained pounds.
And God said, "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil with
which to cook them."
So Satan brought forth chicken fried steak so big it needed its own
platter. And Man gained pounds, and his bad cholesterol went through the
roof.
And God brought forth running shoes, and Man resolved to lose those extra
pounds.
So Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not have
to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2. And Man gained pounds.
And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil."
So God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and
brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into
chips and deep fat fried them. And he create sour cream dip also.
And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled in
cholesterol. And Satan saw and said, "It is good." And Man went into
cardiac arrest.
So God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.....
And Satan created HMOs.
And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and
spinach and green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman
would live long and healthy lives.
So Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99 cent
double cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with that?"
And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds.
And God created the healthful yogurt, that Woman might keep her figure that
man found so fair.
So Satan froze the yogurt, and he brought forth chocolate, nuts and rightly
colored sprinkle candy to put on the yogurt. And Woman gained pounds.
And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."
So Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon bits, and shredded cheese.
And there was ice cream for dessert. And Woman gained pounds.
And God said, "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil with
which to cook them."
So Satan brought forth chicken fried steak so big it needed its own
platter. And Man gained pounds, and his bad cholesterol went through the
roof.
And God brought forth running shoes, and Man resolved to lose those extra
pounds.
So Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not have
to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2. And Man gained pounds.
And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil."
So God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and
brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into
chips and deep fat fried them. And he create sour cream dip also.
And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled in
cholesterol. And Satan saw and said, "It is good." And Man went into
cardiac arrest.
So God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.....
And Satan created HMOs.