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Busy
05-15-2003, 03:41 PM
First of all I would like to say thank you for all those of you who have prayed for me and my marriage in the last several months. I appreciate your prayers.

A lot has happened since I was unable to login last. For starters, I have had gastric bypass surgery - this is the same kind of surgery that Al Rocher of Good Morning America fame has had. I have successfully lost 75 lbs to date and am still losing. This has been the one bright spot recently in my life.

The week that I was able to return to work, my wife told me that she was divorcing me. She had everything figured out, including who was going to get what and child support etc. It was not a total shock due to the events of the last 2 years but difficult just the same.

Four days later when I came home from work, my daughter (7 yrs) invited me up to have some dinner with them. Since I wanted to spend as much time with her as possible I agreed and went uyp to serve up my 4-5 oz of food. ( new small pouch for a stomach means less food) I put it in a small pyrex custard dish. As I turned and left the kitchen, my wife followed me and picked a fight. I got upset and tossed the food at her. Next thing I knew she had called 911 and had me arrrested for assault/domestic violence. This was the first time I had done anything like that and there has been no history of trouble between us before. I spent 5 days in jail, got lost in the system and had to fight the charges for that as well as the divorce.

I was able to plea bargain down to domestic violence counseling for one year on the assault charge. And I am able to attend classes at a christian counseling program. After completing this all charges will drop.

On the divorce, my wife is not being very cooperative. She has limited the amount of time I get to see my children to 12 hours a week with no overnights. I am grateful for some time with them at this point but she is resistant to me having them 3 days a week and her 4 days. She is also not being very nice when it comes to getting me my mail or resolving the debts/assets.

To top all of this off, my best friend and coworker - a real man of God - has been diagnosed with cancer in his liver and pelvic bone. He is in a great deal of pain, but his spirits are good. The doctor only is giving him a 20% chance that it will go into remission.

Needless to say that with all the changes that I have been going through in the last couple of months I have been emotionally stressed. I am leaning on God as much as I can but I would covet your prayers and support.

Tom Jacobs

[ 05-15-2003, 04:29 PM: Message edited by: Busy ]

Grantspastor
05-15-2003, 09:17 PM
Sounds like you're carrying a big load. I'll pray for you

Busy
05-16-2003, 08:45 AM
Thank you for your prayers. I am finding this a very lonely time right now and it really helps.

drillman
05-18-2003, 02:58 PM
i had the same bipass you had will be 3 years
in june. lost 150 lbs a new man. the only thinf that i can say about the anger is it is smothing that every one that has bipass goes through.
i even told my wife to get out and not to ever come back thank the lord that she did not listen to me
she was able to under stand that i had just lost my best friend and could not ever have it back. and was kind of like withdralls* just food not drink. things will get better just give it time.
just think that to day is the first day of the rest of your new life. it just takes a while be for you dont see your self so fat in the mirror
just hang in there for the kids they will need you the new you the exwife will want to get rid of the kids more of the time when she canent go out sat night because of the kids . just stand by and let them know that you will allwas be there but you better mean it becouse they willl rember every time you forgot them do not promise them anything that you can not follow through. never talk bad about there mom as they rember that also.
i know that a full load but gust do it

happybrew
05-19-2003, 03:09 AM
We are praying for you.


happybrew

Cool Texan
05-19-2003, 03:34 PM
Sorry to hear all the news piling on top of you. I'll send a prayer your way. Hang in there, and keep the chin up.

Busy
05-24-2003, 02:02 PM
Thank you folks for all of your prayers. I really do covet them. I am trying to look at this time as an opportunity to see God's hand in my life. My main concerns are:

My friend Dale - that his cancer will go into remission.

My children - that I will have fair and reasonable parenting time with them. I am looking for at least 3 days a week.

My home - I would like to keep the house that we are currently renting that I will move into. I am concerned about the cost of the mortgage and how I will be able to afford it.

Thanks again for all your prayers.

Tom Jacobs

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God."[2 Cor. 1:3-4, NIV]

DAB
06-05-2003, 07:47 PM
Tom
I am sorry that I did not post sooner, I will be in prayer for you and also your wife. I do hope that she will let you see your kids more.
DAB